The Origin of Breakfasts

(Originally published in Depravda, 1997)

The Origin of Breakfasts

by Sarah Worcester
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Did you ever wonder how (and, more to the point, *why*) the monthy NRARS Loser Breakfasts got started? Were you under the delusion that the NRARS Loser Breakfasts sprang fully-formed from the mind or hand of some Greater Being? Gather 'round, my children, and I shall tell you of the origin of the Loser Breakfasts.

Waaaaay back in the summer of 1994, Chuck was having one of his plays ("Lifetime Contract") produced in a couple of different community theaters. Elden asked the Losers he had regular contact with if any of us wanted to meet at one of the performances of this play. As a result, on the evening of Saturday, July 2, 1994 Arthur Adams, Elden Carnahan, and I attended a performance and met Chuck. Paul Alter had been unable to attend the play, and instead had made plans to meet Elden for Breakfast the next morning (July 3, 1994) at E.J.'s Landing, the restaurant in the Best Weatern in College Park.

Elden and Paul decided to make meeting for breakfast a monthly event (on the first Sunday of each month) and to invite other Losers to join them. Chuck joined them for breakfast (also at E.J.'s) in August or September, and I attended my first breakfast (at E.J.'s) in October of 1994. Also in attendance at the October breakfast were Elden, Paul Alter, Arthur Adams, J. Calvin Smith and his fiancee, and the Angel of Doom.

Acting on a suggestion from one of his correspondents, Elden scheduled the next month's breakfast at the Key Bridge Marriott. Attending were Chuck, Tom Witte, Robin Grove, Steve Dudzik, Paul Alter, Elden, Arthur Adams, the Angel of Doom, J. Calvin Smith, and me. (There was also an unfortunate mixup with the reservations, resulting in Joe Romm and Paul Kondis being seated together in another room, without us knowing they were there.) That was a particularly memorable breakfast, because only a few of us had ever seen each other, and we had to scan the parade of people entering the lobby of the Marriott and pick out who *looked* like he might be a loser. (Interestingly, we were right every time.) Elden and his crew were also quite late, having gotten lost several times on the way. (Whenever anyone brings this up, Elden can be counted on to point out the Steve Dudzik swore he knew how to get there.)

The December '94 breakfast was held back at E.J.'s Landing. The January '95 breakfast was back at the Key Bridge Marriott, and was attended by a then-record number of Losers. It was the first of the Modern Loser Breakfasts, at which there were more people than could easily fit around a single table or two. The rotation between Maryland, DC, and Virginia for monthly breakfasts also started with the January '95 breakfast.

And so started the Loser Breakfasts, evolving through one hideous mistake after another to the tradition we all know and love today.