Style Invitational Week 1465: Put your ’22 cents in with predictions for next year
Plus ‘Cuomotose’ and other winning new terms named after people

(Bob Staake for The Washington Post)
By Pat Myers
December 2, 2021 at 9:45 a.m. EST

(Click here to skip down to the winning eponym-neologisms)

April 1, 2022: Mandates now change so often that electric “MASK” / “NO MASK” signs have been installed on D.C. street corners next to the traffic lights and “No Turn on Red.”

Jan. 6: Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene claims her personal liberty has been violated when a guard won’t let her enter the Capitol with a surface-to-air missile launcher.

May 2: Tesla stockholders are dismayed when CEO Elon Musk announces he is changing his name to Spacely and that his company will stop manufacturing electric cars in favor of sprockets.

Last December, when we last made our squint into a Purell-wiped Style Invitational Crystal Ball, the Losers predicted these occurrences, among others, for 2021:
Jan. 20: Trump tees off precisely at noon and is expected to remain teed off for the next four years. (Kevin Dopart)
Jan. 31: Louis DeJoy refuses to leave office, claiming that President Biden’s letter relieving him of his duties was lost in the mail. (Duncan Stevens)
August: Three thousand passengers set sail on an anti-vaxxers-only cruise. Ten days later the ship plunges over the edge of the earth. (Lee Graham)

Maybe the idea is to warn people you might explode? The socks are this week’s second prize.
Maybe the idea is to warn people you might explode? The socks are this week’s second prize.

Okay, that last one didn’t happen, thank goodness.

This week: Name some humorous news event to happen in 2022, as in the examples above; the last two are by Loser Malcolm Fleschner, from whose humor column we brazenly stole this timeline idea years ago. (The column is now at; his own Year in Preview will be out late this month.) Include a date for the event only if it’s relevant; if not, the Empress will add one at random to fill up the timeline.

Submit up to 25 entries at (no capitals in the Web address). Deadline is Monday, Dec. 13; results appear Jan. 2 in print, Dec. 30 online.

Winner gets the Clowning Achievement, our Style Invitational trophy. Second place receives a pretty pair of socks with a dandelion motif and, near the top, the inscription “I never fart.” Donated by Loser Dave Prevar, who, well, we don’t know.

Other runners-up win their choice of our “For Best Results, Pour Into Top End” Loser Mug or our “Whole Fools” Grossery Bag. Honorable mentions get one of our new lusted-after Loser magnets, “A Small Jester of Appreciation” or “Close, but Ceci N’est Pas un Cigare.” First Offenders receive only a smelly tree-shaped air “freshener” (FirStink for their first ink). See general contest rules and guidelines at The headline “Nom Foolery” is by Jon Gearhart; Jesse Frankovich and Tom Witte both thought of the honorable-mentions subhead. Join the Style Invitational Devotees group on Facebook at; “like” the Style Invitational Ink of the Day on Facebook at; and follow @StyleInvite on Twitter.

The Style Conversational: The Empress’s weekly online column discusses each new contest and set of results. See this week’s, published late Thursday, Dec. 2, at

And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . .

Nom foolery: Fun with eponyms
In Week 1461 the Empress asked the Loser Community to coin words based on people’s names. (She had called those words eponyms, but some dictionaries — including the one used by The Post — reserve that term to mean the person who inspired the word, not the word itself.)

Naturally, the E got lots of tiresome entries like “Trump, n.: A big pile of smelly doo-doo.” In fact, TFG gets no eponym ink this week.

Not getting the reference? Click on the link in the name to see the eponym.

4th place:
Trebekois, n. pl.: Snobby game show viewers who will never be satisfied, no matter who the new host is. (Chuck Helwig, Centreville, Va.)

3rd place:
Toobin’: I’m not sure exactly what, but apparently it’s doin’ something with your tube. (Roy Ashley, Washington)

2nd place
and the pizza hat:
Ovechkinetic: Moving with speed and strength that belies one’s age. Synonym: Bradioactive. (Steve Fahey, Olney, Md.)

And the winner of the Clowning Achievement:
KevinMcCarthyism: Blacklisting people who agree to appear before a House committee investigating un-American activities. (Donald Norum, Charlottesville, Va.)

Terrible with names: Honorable mentions
Aaron, v.: To mislead your co-workers into thinking you’ve been vaccinated. “It’s one thing to be aaron in a Zoom meeting, but another when you’re aaron in a tight huddle.” (Wendy Shang, Falls Church, Va.)

(Such people could also be called Nimrodgers [Dave Silberstein, College Park, Md.] and Rodgerks [Jon Gearhart, Des Moines])

Manchin: A luxurious “property” owned by coal industry executives. (Frank Mann, Washington)

Manchinations: The hard work of negotiating a less desirable outcome.“After months of manchinations, the Democrats are pleased to announce $1.76 in new spending to support families.” (Jeff Normandin, York, Maine)

Ahemsworthy: So attractive that you have to alert your friend. “Ahem! Look behind you! OMG . . .” (Amanda Yanovitch, Midlothian, Va.)

Gosarcasm: Lighthearted humor about murdering your co-worker. (Marty Gold, Arlington, Va.; Lee Graham, Rockville, Md.)

Heehawley: A Stanford and Yale graduate who poses as a bumpkin for political gain. (Greg Dobbins, Boynton Beach, Fla.)

All-day zucker: Someone who is on Facebook 24/7. “All-day zuckers keep the ad money flowing to Meta.” (Chris Doyle, Denton, Tex.)

Andrewwww: The latest unsavory royal. (Frank Osen, Pasadena, Calif.)

A-OC: Acceptable to the extreme left of the Democratic Party. “As long as the platform contains the Green New Deal, I’m A-OC with it.” (Mike Gips, Bethesda, Md.)

Beelzeburb: A hellish area near a large city. “Thirteen thousand car crashes in one year? I tell you, Fairfax County is one big beelzuburb.” (Jeff Shirley, Richmond, Va.)

Interrygation: An interview on NPR’s “Fresh Air.” (Jonathan Jensen, Baltimore)

Sorosed: To be blamed for nearly everything. “Fed Chairman Jerome Powell is coming dangerously close to being sorosed for inflation, the broken supply chain, and slow baseball games.” (Steve Leifer, Potomac, Md.)

Zen-Psaki: Extraordinary calm and competence under interrogation. (Terri Berg Smith, Rockville, Md.)

Comeuppence: A lesson learned by being thrown under the bus by someone you stuck your neck out for. (Amanda Yanovitch)

Gohmert pile: A load of Qanonsense. (Chris Doyle)

Giulianesty: Sincere prevarication. “The lawyer spoke with utmost giulianesty about rigged voting machines and shirt tucking.” (Kevin Dopart, Washington)

Connery: Being the height of cool. “Man, I wish I were as connery as James Bond.” (Richard Franklin, Alexandria, Va.)

Cruz: An indulgent vacation timed to get out of responsibilities. “Oh, I’ll be on a cruz next week, so I’ll be out of town during Mom’s operation.”(Daniel Galef, Tallahassee)

Cuomotose: Describing a political career knocked out by scandal. “Not even Stormy Daniels could render Trump cuomotose.” (Craig Schopmeyer, Kensington, Md.; Chris Doyle)

Fauci pas: The grave political sin of changing your position after learning something new. (Donald Norum)

DeJoyride: Driving an institution into the ground. (Chris Doyle)

Chering: Methodically reworking aging body parts. “She’d already had a facelift, tummy tuck and Brazilian butt lift, but she wasn’t quite finished chering her bod.” (Dave Airozo, Silver Spring, Md.)

Meghanomics: The effect of bad PR on the British royal family’s state allowance. (Jon Ketzner, Cumberland, Md.)

Eastmanure: Delusional legal strategy. “The memo urging Vice President Pence to overturn the election results was pure Eastmanure.”(Mark Raffman, Reston, Va.)

Elizabeth Homes: They’re advertised as mansions but are actually studio apartments. (Jesse Rifkin, Arlington, Va.)

Muskatel: A wine made from sour grapes that isn’t subject to any taxation for some reason. (Jeff Contompasis, Ashburn, Va.)

Shaqcess: The ability to reach items on high shelves. (Tom Witte, Montgomery Village, Md.)

Shatnerve: What you need to go into space in your nineties. (Beverley Sharp, Montgomery, Ala.)

Winfree: Surprise swag found under your chair. (Terri Berg Smith)

Young-kin: Politically embarrassing offspring. “The candidate’s rhetoric on election integrity was undermined — or confirmed? — when his 17-year-old young-kin tried twice to vote.” (Jeff Rackow, Bethesda, Md.)

YoungKindle: An E-reader with a built-in Toni Morrison blocker. (Dave Silberstein)

Berny: Loud and obstreperous. “I told Debbie I didn’t think her presentation would fly, and she got all berny. I walked away but she might still be yelling at me.” (Duncan Stevens, Vienna, Va.)

Birxa: A whole-body garment that prevents a person from speaking truth to power. Apparently, it can be removed when promoting a book. (Lee Graham)

Hannitifa: A menacing cadre of Fox News fans who terrorize liberal demonstrators. (Jonathan Jensen)

Belicheckered: Characterized by success and scandal in equal measure. “He may have won a lot of titles, but those cheating allegations give him a belicheckered past.” (Mike Gips)

Desantisize: To remove health and safety standards. “Rand Paul has decided to DeSantisize his medical practice, eliminating all masks, gloves, and the practice of scrubbing in favor of personal freedom.” (Bird Waring, Larchmont, N.Y.)

Osteentation: The vulgar and pretentious display of God’s blessings. (Donald Norum)

DeGeneral: A boss who’s conspicuously sweet to the public, but nasty to the staff. (Terri Berg Smith)

Abbottoir: The Texas legislature. “The abbottoir butchered voting rights in its last session.” (Chris Doyle)

Bidenema: A tax needed to pay for large spending bills. “The rich need a Bidenema because current IRS laws haven’t cleaned them out enough.” (Jon Gearhart)

Dejenner: To alter the original design. “The engineer made the control assembly fit by dejennering the radio antenna.” (Milo Sauer, Fairfax, Va.)

And Last: Oh-myers: Style Invitational entries that the Empress realizes she had better not run if she wants to keep her job. (Eric Nelkin, Silver Spring, Md.)

Still running — deadline Monday night, Dec. 6: our cartoon caption contest. See

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