Style Invitational Week 1225: The Ideas of March — give us slogans for
the march of your choice


Plus winners for our contest to describe the child of any two people
from history




(Bob Staake/For The Washington Post )
By Pat Myers By Pat Myers

Entertainment
April 27 at 9:47 AM



(Click here to skip down <#report> to the winning “children” from Week 1221)

It’s not clear how much effect last weekend’s March for Science will
have on the current administration — budget director Mick Mulvaney said
of federal climate science programs, “We consider that to be a waste of
your money to go out and do that”

— but one thing is certain: There were a lot of great protest signs.

“Think While It’s Still Legal.”

“What do we want? Evidence-based science! When do we want it? After peer
review!”

The mascot of the Georgia GOP? This week's second prize, an elephant
made from peach pits. (Pat Myers/The Washington Post )

“Got Polio? Me Neither. Thanks, Science!”

And a picture of Planet Earth with the slogan “I’m With Her.”

But surely scientists aren’t the only community that can step up wittily
for its cause. *This week: Suggest a march for some group or field,
along with one or more slogans. (You might also, or instead, comment on
the march with some pertinent wordplay.) * Be sure to Google your slogan
to make sure it’s not all over a bunch of T-shirts already.

*Submit entries at this website: * *bit.ly/enter-invite-1225
* (all lowercase).

Winner gets the *Inkin’ Memorial
,*
the Lincoln statue bobblehead that is the official Style Invitational
trophy. Second place receives a perhaps unique figurine of an elephant
made mostly from varnished peach pits. Donated by Ur-Loser Elden Carnahan.

*Other runners-up *win our new “You Gotta Play to Lose”

Loser Mug or our Grossery Bag, “I Got a B in Punmanship.”
Honorable mentions get one of our new
lusted-after Loser magnets, “No Childishness Left Behind”
or
“Magnum Dopus.”

First Offenders receive only a smelly tree-shaped air “freshener”
(FirStink

for their first ink). Deadline is Monday night, May 8; results published
May 28 (online May 25). See general contest rules and guidelines at
wapo.st/InvRules . “The Ideas of March” was a
comment by Loser Diane Wah in a Style Invitational Devotees thread about
a pondered March for Math. “Putting on heirs” in the headline for this
week’s results was submitted by both Jon Gearhart and Jeff Contompasis;
the honorable-mentions subhead is by Jesse Frankovich. Join the Style
Invitational Devotees group on Facebook at /on.fb.me/invdev
./ “Like” Style Invitational Ink of the Day on
Facebook at /bit.ly/inkofday. /

*The Style Conversational *The Empress’s weekly online column, published
late Thursday afternoon, discusses each new contest and set of results.
Especially if you plan to enter, check it out at wapo.st/styleconv
.

And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . .

In *Week 1221 * we asked you to muse upon
what the offspring of any two people through history (or fiction) — this
time including same-sex couples — would be like.

4th place

The child of *Michelangelo and Banksy
*would paint the outside of the
Sistine Chapel.
(Tom Witte, Montgomery Village, Md.)

3rd place

The child of *Donald Trump and Steve Jobs *would be happy to grab your PC.
(Chris Doyle, Denton, Tex.)

2nd place and the animatronic chipmunk:

Fifty percent of people would love the child of *Ray Romano and Ted Cruz.
* (Duncan Stevens, Vienna, Va.)

And the winner of the Inkin’ Memorial:

The child of *Paul Simon and Henry VIII *could recommend 51 ways to
leave your lover.
(Dave Matuskey, Sacramento)

Bland parenthood: honorable mentions

The child of *William the Conqueror and John James Audubon *would
publish the Victorious Egret catalogue. (Dudley Thompson, Cary, N.C.)

The child of *Benito Mussolini and Britney Spears *would be a train
wreck that runs on time. (Jim Derby, Rockville, Md.)

The child of *Paul Ryan and Bob Vila *would tear out all your plumbing
fixtures, put an outhouse in your backyard, and call it a huge
improvement. (Duncan Stevens)

The child of *Jared Kushner and Caitlyn Jenner *would reinvent the
federal government, bring peace to the Middle East, defeat ISIS, oversee
construction of a border wall with Mexico, replace the Affordable Care
Act, and win the Olympic decathlon as both a man and as a woman. (Roy
Ashley, Washington)

The child of *Manute Bol and Patty Hearst *would be tall, dark and
ransomed. (Dave Matuskey)

The child of *Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway *would definitely /not/ be
named Oscar. (Amy Harris, Charlottesville, Va.)

A son of *The Donald and Elizabeth Barrett Browning *would spend all his
time counting the ways he loved himself. (John McCooey, Rehoboth Beach,
Del.)

The child of *Paul McCartney and Annie *would sing “Today.” (Duncan
Stevens)

The child of *Mr. T and Gordon Ramsay *will pity the food. (Kevin
Dopart, Washington)

The child of *Mick Jagger and Roberto Durán *would gather no más. (Dave
Matuskey)

The child of *Roberta Flack and Vladimir Putin *will kill you softly
with his polonium. (Michele Uhler, Fort Washington, Md.)

The child of *Mike Tyson and Vladimir Putin *would take a bite out of
Crimea. (Dave Matuskey)

The child of *Michael Flynn and Jenny McCarthy *will never expect
immunity. (Kevin Dopart)

The child of *Scott Joplin and Levi Strauss *would go from rags to
britches. (Mae Scanlan, Washington)

The toddler child of *Sean Spicer and Kellyanne Conway* would have to
wear fireproof Pull-Ups. (Ira Allen, Bethesda, Md.)

For the child of *Lazarus and Donald Trump,* death and taxes wouldn’t be
certain. (Jeff Shirley, Richmond, Va.)

If a child had been born to *William Strunk and E.B. White,* they would
be he or she. (Dave Matuskey)

The child of *George Gallup and Frank Luntz *will be bipolar. (Dave
Silberstein, College Park, Md.)

The child of *Marcel Marceau and Norman Bates *would keep mum. (Beverley
Sharp, Montgomery, Ala.)

The child of *Prince and Jeffrey Dahmer *would be a purple people eater.
(Leigh Giza, Bristow, Va.)

Any children *Mike Pence *had with *Greta Garbo* would want to be left
alone, but with a chaperon. (Stephen Litterst, Newark, Del.)

In the delivery room, after the birth of their seventh child, *Ron
Popeil *would encourage *Nadya Suleman* by shouting, “But wait, there’s
more!” (Seth Tucker, Washington)

The child of *Archimedes and Paul Simon *would find 50 ways to love his
lever. (Chris Doyle)

I’m afraid that the child of *Cleopatra and Ronald McDonald* would have
asp-burger syndrome. (Mark Raffman, Reston, Va.; Neal Starkman, Seattle)

If *Donald Duck married Annie Oakley,* their kid would be a quack shot.
(Steve Fahey, Kensington, Md.)

The child of *Harpo Marx and Marcel Marceau *would commit unspeakable
acts. (Jeff Shirley)

The child of *Helen Hunt and Gregory Peck* would be a great actor but a
slow typist. (Jesse Frankovich, Lansing, Mich.)

The child of *Ivanka Trump and Mahatma Gandhi *would make millions of
dollars selling designer loincloths. (Robert Schechter, Dix Hills, N.Y.)

The child of *John Nance Garner
and Gaylord Perry
*would grow up to be a
pitcher of warm spitballs. (Dudley Thompson)

The child of *Johnny Cash and Paul Ryan *would take away your health
care just to watch you die. (Robert Schechter)

The child of *Lucrezia Borgia and John Chapman *would go about spreading
poison ivy seeds. (Jeff Contompasis, Ashburn, Va.)

The child of *Mata Hari and Hannibal* would double-cross the Alps.
(Warren Clements, Toronto)

The child of *Mother Teresa and Don Rickles *would feed starving
children and then make fun of the way they chew. (Robert Schechter)

The child of *Sisyphus and Mr. Whipple *will be a fan of rock-and-roll.
(Larry Gray, Union Bridge, Md.)

The child of *Timothy Leary and Dick Van Dyke *would always be tripping
on the ottoman. (Dave Matuskey)

The child of *Balaam and King David* would have his ass in a sling.
(Dudley Thompson)

The child of *Deepak Chopra and Betsy DeVos *would be om-schooled.
(Chris Doyle)



Sadly, the child of *Julian Assange and Chelsea Manning *will turn out
to be a chronic bed wetter. (David Garratt, Silver City, N.M.)

The child of *George Clooney and Joanne Free *would have a very happy
mom. (Joanne Free, Clifton, Va.)

The child of *Carrot Top and *. . . nah. (Michael Rolfe, Cape Town,
South Africa)

*Still running — deadline Monday night, May 1: Our contest to compare
any two random items on a list we supplied. See bit.ly/invite1224
. *