Style Invitational Week 1174: Colt Following — it’s time for the

On Kentucky Derby weekend, we trot out this year’s winning horse
names — and saddle up Generation B

his year’s winning horse
names — and saddle up Generation B

You weren't one of the 52 Losers who got ink this week? Give it another
go with the grandfoals contest. (Bob Staake for The Washington Post)
By Pat Myers Entertainment
May 5

Even though the Empress just finished tossing approximately 3,950 of the
Week 1170 “foal” names in her virtual wastebasket — the rest of them got
ink today — she’s haughtily confident that the Loser Community will trot
right back into the starting gate for the Invite’s 11th annual
“grandfoal” contest. *This week: “Breed” any two of the 57 foal names
that got ink this week and name the offspring to reflect both parents’
names,* in the style of the first-generation combinations published
today. Just as for the first-round contest, the names are limited to 18
characters including spaces and punctuation marks. As always, don’t
“breed” three horses together, and don’t give the foal a name that’s on
the list. As always, you may submit as many as 25 names. Note: Be sure
to spell the parents’ names as they’re printed here.

Winner gets the Inkin’ Memorial
the Lincoln statue bobblehead that is the official Style Invitational
trophy. And speaking of animal romance: Second place receives, direct
from New Zealand from Loser Bruce Alter . . . well, this week it should
be jockey shorts, but it’s a pair of souvenir boxers with little cartoon
kiwi birds crudely romancing little cartoon sheep. The waistband proudly
says “New Zealand” all around. This lovely garment will make you look
your best Down Under.

*Other runners-up* win their choice of a yearned-for Loser Mug,
the older-model
“This Is Your Brain on Mugs” mug

or a vintage Loser T-shirt. Honorable mentions get one of our
lusted-after Loser magnets, “Magnet Dum Laude”

or “Falling Jest Short.”

First Offenders receive a smelly tree-shaped air “freshener” (FirStink

for their first ink). Email entries to /
/ Deadline is Monday night, May 16; results
published June 5 (online June 2). You may submit up to 25 entries per
contest. Include “Week 1174” in your email subject line or it might be
ignored as spam. Include your real name, postal address and phone number
with your entry. See contest rules and guidelines at
. The headline for this week’s results is by
Tom Witte; the honorable-mentions subhead is by Beverley Sharp. Join the
lively Style Invitational Devotees group on Facebook at /
./ “Like” the Style Invitational Ink of the Day
on Facebook at /; / follow @StyleInvite
on Twitter.

*The Style Conversational: *The Empress’s weekly online column,
published late Thursday afternoon, discusses each new contest and set of
results. Especially if you plan to enter, check it out at

The Kentucky Derby’s second-place finisher wins $400,000. Our
second-place grandfoal wins risque boxer shorts from New Zealand.

*In Week 1170 ,* our 22nd annual
foal-“breeding” contest, we gave you a list of 100 of the horses
nominated for this year’s Triple Crown races and asked you to “breed”
any two and name the “foal.”

The field was, as usual, highly crowded —
just about 4,000 entries — and, as usual, of Triple Crown quality: The
Empress’s “shortlist” of worthies topped 250 names. Lots of First
Offenders this week, as well as ink for several Losers who play only the
horses each year — such as Mary Lee Fox Roe, who, before the Empress
started the 25-entry limit, would send in 600 foal names in a single
contest. The Empress’s job was made immeasurably more manageable by the
entry-sorting program created by Loser Jonathan Hardis. (Jonathan could
probably measure that, too; he works for the National Institute of
Standards and Technology.)

4th place

*Awesome Speed x Gulf Of Mexico = Don’tMethWithTexas *(Pete Morelewicz,

3rd place

*Suddenbreakingnews x Twenty Four Seven = PlaneStillMissing!* (Mark
LeVota, Washington, a First Offender)

2nd place

/and thepocket-size Derby board game
*Big Red Rocket x Cold Blood = Wile E. Capote *(Pam Sweeney, Burlington,

And the winner of the Inkin’ Memorial

*Perfect Saint x Caribbean = Francis Of A C Sea *(Danielle Nowlin,
Fairfax Station, Va.)


*Awesome Speed x Rated R Superstar = Sandra Buttock *(Kurt Stahl,
Frederick, Md.)

*Awesome Speed x Exaggerator = Crystal Meh* (Jesse Frankovich, Lansing,

*Cherry Wine x Can’t Remember = Bing Cosby *(Tom Witte, Montgomery
Village, Md.)

*Mohaymen x Bar None = Mohaypeople* (Jesse Frankovich)

*Big Red Rocket x Exaggerator = Thrust But Verify* (Dudley Thompson,
Cary, N.C.)

*Billy’s Kitten x Ten Blessings = Hanukkah Lewinsky* (Beth Morgan, Palo
Alto, Calif.)

*Bombs Away x Caribbean = Apocalypso* (Jeff Shirley, Richmond, Va.)

*Exaggerator x Brody’s Cause = Yuge Pianist* (Frank Osen, Pasadena, Calif.)

*Molasses Brown x Destin = Desitin* (Todd DeLap, Fairfax, Va.)

*Annals of Time x Mighty Moses = Auld Lang Zion* (Chris Doyle, Denton,

*Attraction x Name Changer = Kiss Me Cait* (Barry Koch, Catlett, Va.)

*Big Squeeze x Billy’s Kitten = Pus in Boots* (Stephen Dudzik, Olney, Md.)

*General MacArthur x Happy Match = I Shall Re-Burn* (Todd DeLap)

*General MacArthur x Mighty Moses = Thou Shalt Return* (Rob Wolf,
Gaithersburg, Md.)

*General MacArthur x Stradivari = I Shall Retune* (Jeffrey Steinberg,
Bethesda, Md., a First Offender; John McCooey, Rehoboth Beach, Del.)

*Ima Monster x Pinstripe = HydeOfTheYankees *(Andrew Hoenig, Rockville,

*Stradivari x Miles of Humor = Yo-Yo Mama* (Steve Price, New York)

*Mighty Moses x Big Squeeze = Let My Pimple Go* (Ellen Raphaeli, Falls
Church, Va.; Larry Gray, Union Bridge, Md.)

*Life Is A Trip x Twenty Four Seven = Timothy Weary* (Harold Mantle,
Lafayette, Calif.)

*Perfect Saint x Percolator = St. Arbucks* (Gordon Arsenoff, St. Louis)

*Economic Model x Flexibility = WhatAnswerYouWant?* (Perry Beider,
Silver Spring, Md.)

*Emoji Man x Can’t Remember ¯\_(ツ)_/¯* (Emily Davis, Boise, Idaho)

*Awesome Speed x Dressed in Hermes = Nascarf* (Kathryn Perry, Fort
Worth, Tex.)

*Pinnacle Peak x Diplodocus = Thesaurus* (David Kofalt, Gaithersburg, Md.)

*Mighty Moses x Flexibility = TheTenSuggestions* (Laurie Brink,
Cleveland, Mo.)

*General MacArthur x Gettysburg = Return Address *(Dave Matuskey,
Sacramento, Calif., a First Offender)

*Giant Trick x Mohaymen = HoMayhem *(Sam Laudenslager, Burke, Va.)

*Nyquist x Start A War = Dyquick *(Ward Kay, Vienna, Va.)

*Creator x Catapult = Adam and Heave* (Roy Ashley, Washington)

*Great Dane x Who’s Out = Not To Be *(Annette Green, Lexington, Va., a
First Offender)

*Mooose x Mor Spirit = Gimme Another O! * (Roy Ashley)

*Whitmore x Who’s Out = __itm_re* (Kathy Hardis Fraeman, Olney, Md.;
Jeff Contompasis, Ashburn, Va.)

*Mooose x Name Changer = Autocorrect: Nose *(John Kammer, South Riding,

*Perfect Saint x Annals of Time = Joan of Archives* (John Hutchins,
Silver Spring, Md.)

*Annals Of Time x Gun Runner = Glock Watcher* (Pamela Love, Columbia,
Md., a First Offender)

*Dressed In Hermes x Can’t Remember = Glamnesia* (Dave Silberstein,
College Park, Md.; Jeff Shirley)

*Great Dane x Can’t Remember = Ham Somebody? * (Roger Dalrymple,
Gettysburg, Pa.)

*Can’t Remember x Gulf Of Mexico = Señor Moment* (Gary Crockett, Chevy
Chase, Md.)

*Big Squeeze x Mooose = Significant Udder* (Laura Bennett Peterson,

*Riddler x Big Squeeze = Sphinxter* (John Winant, Annandale, Va.)

*Can’t Remember x Urban Bourbon = Take the Fifth* (Mary Lee Fox Roe,
Mount Kisco, N.Y.; Ellen Raphaeli)

*Urban Bourbon x Can’t Remember = Jack Denial’s * (Dudley Thompson)

*Dressed In Hermes x Rated R Superstar = Dressed In Herpes * (Mary Lee
Fox Roe)

*Economic Model x Emoji Man = Supply and :D Man *(Dave Komornik,
Danville, Va.)

*Magical Mystery x Emoji Man = IM the Walrus *(Matt Monitto, Bristol,

*Emoji Man x Smokey Image = SecondThatEmoticon *(Kevin Dopart,
Washington; Jonathan Hardis, Gaithersburg, Md.)

*Awesome Speed x Diplodocus = Prontosaurus* (Jeff Contompasis)

*Enroute x Magical Mystery = Recalculating …* (Stuart Rogers, Toronto)

*Enroute x Perfect Saint = Someone Else’s Kid *(Mike Gips, Bethesda, Md.)

*Pinnacle Peak x Exaggerator = OK, Moderate Mound *(Sarah Jay,
Churchville, Md.)

*Name Changer x Gun Runner = AKA-47* (Danielle Nowlin; Jeff Contompasis)

*Magical Mystery x Weight No More = Genie Craig* (Kathleen DeBold,
Burtonsville, Md.)

*Mo Tom x Weight No More = Les Tom *(Rose C. Breidenbaugh, Silver
Spring, Md., a First Offender)

** *Still running — deadline Monday night, May 9: Our contest to
slightly change the name of a food.