Style Invitational Week 1173: Tinker with the recipe — change the name
of a food

Plus the winning ‘reviews’ of movies as acrostics of their titles

Spaghetti-Z's, not the most thrilling pasta dish. Alter a food name in
Week 1173 of The Style Invitational. (Bob Staake /for The Washington Post )
By Pat Myers Entertainment
April 28

(Click here to skip down <#report> to the winning acrostics/backronyms
from Week 1169)

*Spaghetti-Z’s: Okay, not the most exciting dinner in a can ... *

*Gif: Peanut butter that you’ll keep eating and eating and eating ... *

*Weedies: The more of this cereal you eat, the hungrier you get.*

** *Bristle sprouts: Clean out your insides with the highest-fiber
vegetable around. *

Silkworms and sour grapes: The Loser Gourmet Prize Pack for this week’s
second-place finisher. (Pat Myers/The Washington Post)


Go ahead, play with your food. *This week: Slightly change the name of a
food or brand of food (or something else in the food industry) and
describe it, or write a slogan, jingle, etc. * By “slightly change,” we
mean you shouldn’t have to explain to the Empress what the product was
in the first place. We’ve done this contest once before, back in 2009,
but there’s a lot of food out there; we’re sure you can give us a whole
new menu. (See this week’s Style Conversational column, at , (published Thursday
afternoon, April 28) to see what got ink in Week 845; you may reuse an
inking name as long as you give a significantly different description.)

Winner gets the Inkin’ Memorial
the Lincoln statue bobblehead that is the official Style Invitational
trophy. Second place receives, of course, food — /two/ foods: first, a
can of genuine Korean silkworms, picked up by the Empress at the Lotte
supermarket in Springfield, Va., but given a pass by the Royal Consort;
and, because we know that the second-place finisher didn’t want that
ugly ol’ Inkin’ Memorial anyway, an actual jar of genuine imported sour

*Other runners-up* win their choice of a yearned-for Loser Mug,
the older-model
“This Is Your Brain on Mugs” mug

or a vintage Loser T-shirt. Honorable mentions get one of our
lusted-after Loser magnets, “Magnet Dum Laude”

or “Falling Jest Short.”

First Offenders receive a smelly tree-shaped air “freshener” (FirStink

for their first ink). Email entries to /
./ Deadline is Monday night, May 9; results
published May 29 (online May 26). You may submit up to 25 entries per
contest. Include “Week 1173” in your email subject line or it might be
ignored as spam. Include your real name, postal address and phone number
with your entry. See contest rules and guidelines at
. The headline for this week’s results is by
Tom Witte; the honorable-mentions subhead is by Chris Doyle. Join the
lively Style Invitational Devotees group on Facebook at /
./ “Like” the Style Invitational Ink of the Day
on Facebook at /; / follow @StyleInvite
on Twitter.

*The Style Conversational: *The Empress’s weekly online column,
published late Thursday afternoon , discusses each new contest and set
of results. Especially if you plan to enter, check it out at

And the winners of the Style Invitational contest announced four weeks
ago . . .

In Week 1169 we asked you to “review” or
otherwise describe a movie, book, play or TV show as an acrostic, or
backronym — in which the first letters of the words spell out the name
of the work.

4th place:

*THE SIMPSONS:* To Homer, everything simple is most precious:
sandwiches, oxygen, nuclear science . . . (Jon Gearhart, Des Moines)

3rd place:

*THE MARRIAGE OF FIGARO:* Take “Hamilton’s” example: Make a rap revival!
It’s antiquated, grabs exclusively old farts. Freshen it! Guaranteed
audiences! Rap Opera! (Hildy Zampella, Falls Church, Va.)

2nd place and the ‘Number Two Pencil’ with poop motif:

*PSYCHO:* Peacefully showering, you’re clean, happy . . . OMG!!!
(Stephen Gold, Glasgow, Scotland)

And the winner of the Inkin’ Memorial:

act motivated!
Expectations of finished tomes have readers overanalyzing nearly every
scene! (Kurt Stahl, Frederick, Md.)

Lackronyms: Honorable mentions

*THE WEST WING:* TV’s habitual escapism: Wise executive solves the
world’s issues — no gridlock! (Barry Koch, Catlett, Va.)

*THE TEN COMMANDMENTS:* The Hebrews exit (Thanks, Egypt — not!),
complaining: “Oy! Moses! Manna again!” Nice desert. Man emotes next to
Sinai. (Stephen Gold)

*TWILIGHT:* Twit woman inspired love in gorgeous hunks? Typical! (Gary
Crockett, Chevy Chase, Md.)

*THE AMERICANS:* Two hairpieced expert apparatchik moles evade Reagan’s
illustrious CIA as nation sleeps. (Paul Comstock, Lancaster, Pa.)

*BATMAN:* Bruce appreciates that manservant Alfred’s nonjudgmental.
(Jeff Contompasis, Ashburn, Va.)

*WHO’S AFRAID OF VIRGINIA WOOLF?:* Washed-up historian overdoes sadistic
/amore./ Frump retaliates, and in devilishly overt flirtation vivifies
irresistible rookie geometry instructor. (No, it’s algebra. Whatever.)
Offspring offed. Lasciviously Freudian! (Barry Brennessel, Silver
Spring, Md.)

*FAST AND FURIOUS:* Forget about story — there’s absolutely none. (Does
feature unnecessary racing, incessant overdrive, underdressed starlets.)
(Ward Kay, Vienna, Va.)

*BRIAN’S SONG: * Bro relations in action. Next, see sobbing of normal
guys. (Steve McClemons, Arlington, Va.)

*ATLAS SHRUGGED: *“Altruism’s totally lame!” Ayn says. Selfish hero’s
rant: unbelievably gassy. Grimly earnest didacticism. (Duncan Stevens,
Vienna, Va.)

*BAMBI:* Blam! And Mama bites it! (Hildy Zampella)

*DELIVERANCE: * Dang, everyone loves interesting vacations. (Exceptions:
river abductions, nightmarish carnal encounters.) (Frank Mann, Washington)

*MAGIC MIKE:* Matrons are going in crowds; men, insecure, keep exiting.
(John Hutchins, Silver Spring, Md.)

*WAR AND PEACE:* Wow — avoid Russia! After Napoleon’s defeat,
proletariat’s enraged about cake eating! (Mike Ostapiej, Mount Pleasant,

*WAR AND PEACE:* Who actually reads all ninety dozen pages? Eggheads —
and counterfeit eggheads. (Melissa Balmain, Rochester, N.Y.)

*STAR TREK:* “Space, the area remaining to research Enterprisingly.” —
Kirk (Jon Gearhart)

*BLAZING SADDLES: *Beans launch a zanily incomparable natural gas
symphony, all during dastardly losers’ eating scene. (Melissa Balmain)

*E.T.:* Extra tissues! (Michael Seese, Chagrin Falls, Ohio, a First

*FEAR FACTOR: *Folks eating aborted rat fetuses and cockroaches to
obtain riches! (Jesse Frankovich, Lansing, Mich.)

*THE ART OF THE DEAL: *Trump has excellent advice related to
overcompensating for tiny hands, exhorting: “Don’t ever apologize,
loser!” (Chris Doyle, Denton, Tex.)

*HAROLD AND MAUDE: *He’s a really odd lad dating a nutball decades more
aged — “Until death” etc. (Melissa Balmain)

** *DIE HARD: * **Detective in edifice has a rough day. (Jesse Frankovich)

*SPIDER-MAN: *Some putz in dorky ensemble resembles macho arachnid
ninja. (Robert Schechter, Dix Hills, N.Y.)

*APOCALYPSE NOW: *A psychotic, obsessive colonel — astonishingly loony
yet profoundly shrewd — elects neurosis over war. (Frank Mann)

** *LOLITA: * **Lyin’ on Lyon
in the
afternoon. (Roy Ashley, Washington)

*THE BIBLE: *“Theological hokum! Egregious babble! Insipid balderdash!”
Lord exclaims, OR “Thanks! Helps elucidate Book’s insights brilliantly!”
Lord exults. (Rob Huffman, Fredericksburg, Va.)

*GENESIS:* Gullible Eve naively enjoys snack, initiating sin. (Jesse

*TAXI DRIVER:* Travis’s anger x Iris’s debasement results in virtually
ending Reagan. (Kevin Dopart, Washington)

*GIGLI: * **Gosh, it’s godawful — love it! (Chris Doyle)

*THE BIG BANG THEORY: *They have every big-IQ geek bummed. Aren’t nerdy
geeks trendy? Here, everyone only radiates “yeesh”! (Todd DeLap,
Fairfax, Va.)

*CLEOPATRA: *Critics laud Elizabeth’s /other/ performance: adding to
Richard’s amours. (Chris Doyle)

** *UGLY BETTY: *Univisionesque girl lets you believe energy, talent
triumph. Yuck. (Kevin Dopart)

** *Still running — deadline Monday night, May 2: our contest to write
something using only the words appearing in “American Pie.”