Week 722: Let's Play Nopardy!


That controversial "Gilligan's Island" episode

Hazy, hot, humid and happy

Museum of Suburban Culture

Pamela Anderson's elbow

More bizarre than Karl Rove dancing

Homer Simpson's doctoral thesis

The upside of tooth loss

Arkansas and Old Lace

Outhouse loveseats

Too ostentatious for Donald Trump

Nuanced fart jokes

An inappropriate time to wear a kilt

It's time once again for our chronic not-much-like- "Jeopardy!" contest,
in which we supply 12 phrases and you get to provide questions that they
might answer. The twist this time is that all of the phrases were entries
in our Week 717 contest, which asked for Googlenopes -- phrases that
showed no previous hits from the Google search engine. Some of this
week's Nopes got ink last week; most you're seeing for the first time.

Winner gets the Inker, the official Style Invitational trophy. First
runner-up receives this cool rubber hat that makes its wearer
indistinguishable from a sea urchin. It was bought brand-new and donated
to The Style Invitational in a shamelessly philanthropic (i.e., suckuppy)
move by Loser Dave Prevar of Annapolis.

Other runners-up win their choice of a coveted Style Invitational Loser
T-shirt or yearned-for Loser Mug. Honorable Mentions (or whatever they're
called that week) get one of the lusted-after Style Invitational Magnets.
One prize per entrant per week. Send your entries by e-mail to
losers@washpost.com or by fax to 202-334-4312. Deadline is Monday, July
23. Put "Week 722" in the subject line of your e-mail, or it risks being
ignored as spam. Include your name, postal address and phone number with
your entry. Contests are judged on the basis of humor and originality.
All entries become the property of The Washington Post. Entries may be
edited for taste or content. Results will be published Aug. 12. No
purchase required for entry. Employees of The Washington Post, and their
immediate relatives, are not eligible for prizes. Pseudonymous entries
will be disqualified. The revised title for next week's contest is by
Gary Wiesman of Herndon. This week's Honorable Mentions name is by
Stephen Dudzik of Olney.

Who wrote these Googlenopes (from top to bottom): Malcolm Fleschner, Palo
Alto, Calif.; Leigh Giza, Arlington; Kevin Dopart, Washington; Elwood
Fitzner, Valley City, N.D.; Elwood Fitzner again; Zachary May,
Washington; Xandra Y. Zamora, Northridge, Calif.; Elliott Schiff,
Allentown, Pa.; Jeff Brechlin, Eagan, Minn.; Brian Fox, Charlottesville;
Seth Brown, North Adams, Mass.; Beth Baniszewski, Somerville, Mass. And
the idea for a Googlenope Jeopardy was by Lawrence McGuire of Waldorf.

Report From Week 718, in which we asked readers to combine words from headlines in a single
day's Post to make another headline.

It's safe to say that if The Post
regularly ran headlines like these, the circulation department could take
a giant step back from the ledge.

Horace LaBadie of Dunnellon, Fla., noted that while the Empress stated
that the eligible papers ran through June 25, she neglected to say how
old they could be. So Horace offered one from The Post of Oct. 22, 1992:
"Pr. William Charged With Abuse of Granny Queen."

4. Insane Monkey on PCP Gains Millions Picking the Right Stocks;
Appointed New U.S. Treasury Chief (Scott Slaughter, Mount Airy)

3. Queen 'Gets Down,' Pulls Out Hairpin (Jay Shuck, Minneapolis)

2. The winner of the Octodog hot-dog-octopus maker: To Retain More Gas,
Bush Should Stop Putin (Pie Snelson, Silver Spring)

And the Winner of the Inker

Retirement: Cruising, Travel; Then Medicine, Sippy-Cup (Mae Scanlan, in
retirement, Washington)

Below the Fold

17-Year-Olds Trade Wyeth Art for Two Cellphones at Estate Sale, Say
'Whatever' (Dave Prevar, Annapolis)

Editor Baddeley Needed; Ask With In. Experience Help Full. (Brendan
Beary, Great Mills)

D.C. Requiring Redskins to Be New Religion (John Shea, Lansdowne, Pa.)

Prosecutors Name Gangsta Heads: Still Seeking Face, Ear (Russ Taylor,
Vienna)

Bill Clinton Turns Down Advances From Hot Babes; Pigs Fly (Chris Doyle,
Ponder, Tex.)

Iranians' Religious Freedom Plan: 14th Century Style Barbecue for
Offensive Thoughts (Peter Metrinko, Chantilly)

U.S. Gains Allies: Foreigners Bill and John Make Two More (Russell
Beland, Springfield)

Tiger Strokes Own Behind; Protesters Denounce Event (Marty McCullen,
Gettysburg, Pa.)

Abbas Swears in New Cabinet, Abusing the Language With Sewage Words (Mae
Scanlan)

Bush Delays Meeting with Asia Heads of State, Tackles Backlog of 'All My
Children' Recordings (Brendan Beary)

Attack by Beautiful Babes Last on List of Blogger Fears (Jay Shuck)

Monkeys Beat Washington in Challenge Game; Nationals Owner Wins Bet (Dave
Prevar)

Disney to Open Hillaryland: Bill Envisions Festive 17-Year-Olds (Randy
Lee, Burke)

Mystics Play Naked, Interest Swells (Dave Prevar)

Bush on a Democratic Iraq: 'Rome Not Built in 290,000 Days' (Chris Doyle)

Homer Simpson Appointed Top Nuclear Negotiator to North Korea (Randy Lee)

Congregations Tell Top Cleric: Stop Going On About What We Do Wrong;
Focus on 'Do Your Own Thing' Stuff (Brendan Beary)

Kremlin Boondoggle: 7 Days in Kabul and Milwaukee (Kevin Dopart,
Washington)

Overlooked Syllable Kills Haiku About Naturalization (Jay Shuck)

5 Brothers Obsessed With Queen's Behind; Four Ejected From British
Gardens (Mae Scanlan)

Fed Chief Says China Won't Play Fair With Markets; Chinese Comeback: Yuan
to Make Something Of It? (Brendan Beary)

Montgomery County Takes Going Green to New Extreme: Bethesda to Demand
Eco-Friendly Drug Shootings (Brendan Beary)

Diagnosing Exotic Germs Requires Sexual Professional With Global
Experience (Beverley Sharp, Washington)

New Head Fills In Field; Nationals' Home Awash in Sewage (Dave Prevar)

Sexy Red-Hot Teachers: Not When We Were Young (Peter Metrinko)

Bush Taking Mulligan on Iraq, Will Be Trying Over in Another War-Zone
(Russell Beland)

Wendy's to Overhaul Business, Offer Wine, Women (Dave Prevar)

Senators Deride Courage, Standards; Panel Proposes Perpetual Corruption
(John Shea)

Hints From Heloise: Don't Say 'Macbeth' (Randy Lee)

Global 'Big Bottom' Campaign Counting Morass Abroad (Don Kirkpatrick,
Waynesboro, Pa.)

Autopsy of The Donald: Hair Is From Woolly Mammoth (Randy Lee)

Style Contest Brought On Extreme Hair Loss, Horrible Gas and Monster
Zits, Reader Says (Chris Doyle)

Next Week: We Har the World, or Abomey (Benin) Nations