Week LXXV (408): What's In a Name?


This week we modify a classic contest from two years ago. Take the name of any politician, living or dead, and construct an appropriate message from the letters of the name, as in the examples above. You may use any letter as many times as you want, and you may insert punctuation as you wish, but you are limited to those letters that appear in the name. As before, degree of Difficulty will be a factor in our winning selections: "William Jefferson Clinton" provides no challenge. "Ed Koch" does. First-prize winner gets a genuine vintage Elvis doll, on a stand. Elvis looks vaguely like Dracula. This is worth $ 30.

First runner-up wins the tacky but estimable Style Invitational Loser Pen. Other runners-up win the coveted Style Invitational Loser T-shirt. Honorable Mentions get the mildly sought-after Style Invitational bumper sticker. Send your entries via fax to 202-334-4312, or by e-mail to losers@washpost.com, or by U.S. mail to The Style Invitational, Week LXXI, c/o The Washington Post, 1150 15th St. NW, Washington, D.C. 20071. Deadline is Monday, July 8. All entries must include the week number of the contest and your name, postal address and a daytime or evening telephone number. E-mail entries must include the week number in the subject field. Contests will be judged on the basis of humor and originality. All entries become the property of The Washington Post. Entries may be edited for taste or content. Results will be published in four weeks. No purchase required for entry. Employees of The Washington Post, and their immediate relatives, are not eligible for prizes. Pseudonymous entries will be disqualified. The revised title for next week's contest is by Meg Sullivan of Potomac.

REPORT FROM WEEK LXXI (404), in which we supplied you with 50 lines of dialogue, and challenged you to create cartoons from them.

You were permitted to use one line of your own. Jennifer Hart of Arlington wins a copy of a cartoon she created that we decided not to print. We came to this decision after our boss, Deborah the Nice, pleasantly urged us not to print it because she does not want to go through the tedium of hiring a new Czar just now.

Second Runner-Up:

"OWW! THAT HURTS! GOLLY, CUT IT OUT, WILLYA?"
"OOO, REAL MENSA CANDIDATE HERE" (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)

First Runner-Up:

"A CHIP OFF THE OL' BLOCK, EH?"
WHEN A PUN IS INAPPROPRIATE (Jean Sorensen, Herndon)

And the winner of the North Korean pamphlet:

"NON-SEQUITUR MAN! I WANT TO ASK JILL TO THE PROM. WHAT SHOULD I SAY?"
"ONE TRACTOR OR TWO?"
"HUH? WHAT WAS THAT?"
"HAVE YOU CONSIDERED USING A CATCHER'S MITT? I'M TELLING YOU .... IT'S A COW!"
MEANWHILE, DURING THE EISENHOWER ADMINISTRATION ... "BUT FIRST A LITTLE RU-RU!" (Jonathan Paul, Garrett Park)

Honorable Mentions

"BUT FIRST A LITTLE RU-RU!"
"CUT OUT THE STUPID NICK-NAMES! IT'S A ROOT CANAL!" (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)

"OOOO, REAL MENSA CANDIDATE HERE"
"QUIT SAYING THAT!" (Jack Welsch and Sugar Strawn, Alexandria)

"OWW!"
"SALVE. I NEED SALVE."
"HAVE YOU CONSIDERRED USING A CATCHER'S MITT?" (Dave Ferry, Leeburg)

"OOOF! KERBLAM! KA-RUNCH! ZLIRTCH! JUST ONCE I'D LIKE TO HEAR THOSE DAMFOOL PARENTS TRY TO TAKE ATTENDANCE!" (Jean Sorensen, Herndon)