WEEK 2


Lately, there has been a bit of a stink over the state motto of Maryland: "Fatti Maschii. Parole Femine." We could not understand what all the fuss was about, unless possibly it was insensitive to overweight individuals or incarcerated women.

Then someone pointed out that this was in Latin, and translated it for us. "Manly Deeds, Womanly Words." What is that supposed to mean? Is it as condescending as it sounds? Is it just stupid?

Clearly, Maryland needs a new motto, a multi-purpose slogan suitable for placement on a state seal or a license plate. Something grand, something that embodies the full bodacious majesty of the state.

Something like . . .

Let's see. We'll come up with an idea any minute now. Hang on, we need to consult an Almanac or something. Okay, here we go:

"Maryland: Where John Wilkes Booth got his broken leg splinted"

No, wait, how about:

"Maryland: A Proud Part of the I-95 Corridor"

"Maryland: The Keno State"

"Maryland: Not at All Ashamed of Our Governor"

"Maryland: Its Second-Largest City Is Rockville"

or, for a faux Latin motto:

Fatti Governor, Parole Ex-Governors Or, Forti Tamperi ("Power Corrupts")

You can do better than these, right? Mail your slogans by letter or postcard to "The Style Invitational, Week 2", The Washington Post, 1150 15th Street NW, Washington, D.C. 20071, or fax them to 202-334-4312. Include your phone number. Winners will be announced in two weeks. Entries will be judged on humor and originality.

The first-prize winner will get a huge, tasteless Maryland crab-motif cheezy souvenir ("Maryland: America's Second-Largest Producer of Vulgar Crustacean-Based Ornamental Objects"), an approximate $ 50 value. Runners-up will get the coveted "Style Invitational" loser's T-shirt. Entries must arrive on or before Friday, March 19.

Next Week: The results of Style Invitational, Week 1. A boffo new name for the Redskins.

Employees of The Washington Post, and their immediate families, are not eligible for prizes. No purchase necessary.