||Count the ways
||Give us some musings of a technical wonk.
||Write a description for any of 50 genuine Loser-created neologisms.
||H H |
||DQ Very Much
||Give us a phrase or sentence that would nip a potential relationship in the bud (or elsewhere).
||Doctrine in The House?
||State a humorous, original "doctrine" for a person or other entity.
||Gorey Thoughts From A to Z
||Send us some rhyming alphabet-primer couplets.
||Tour de Fours IV
||Coin and define a humorous word that includes -- with no other letters between them, but in any order you like -- the letters S, A, T and R.
||1 H H |
||Mess With Our Heads
||Take any headline, verbatim, appearing anywhere in The Washington Post or on Washingtonpost.com from July 30 through Aug. 7 and reinterpret it by adding either a "bank headline," or subtitle, or the first sentence of an article that might appear under it.
||Coin the millionth word in the English language and define it. The word must end in -ion.
||It's the Eponymy, Stupid
||Coin a word or expression based on the name of a well-known person, define it, and perhaps use it in a sentence
||It's Open Season
||Come up with a brand-new word and its definition. The words must begin with O, P, Q, R or S.
||Your Secret Here!
||Send us some original secrets (they don't have to be true).
||Ask Backwards, Erudite Edition
||You are on "Jeopardy!" Here are the sophisticated answers. You supply the questions.
||Hyphen the Terrible (New Edition!)
||Combine the beginning of any multi-syllabic word in this week's Invitational with the end of any other multi-syllabic word in this column (or in this week's Web supplement) to coin a new word, and then define it.
||God's Will (and Won't)
||Complete either of the following: "If God hadn't wanted us to ----, God wouldn’t have ----"; "If God had wanted us to ----, God would have ----."
||Evil Things in Store
||Think of evil or just plain stupid practices that the staff of a retail or other establishment might perpetrate.
||You are on "Jeopardy!" Above are the answers. Send us the questions.
||Slightly change the title of a TV show, past or present, and describe it.
||Thine Ad Goest Here
||Propose biblical and other literary passages, poems, etc., that could benefit from product placement.
||Your Slogan Here
||Come up with a clever slogan or sign for a business.
||Lost in Translation
||Find us some comical translations-and-back using Google translator. Feed some passage of English text into the tool--25 words max--and ask it to translate it into one of the five languages offered; then copy the result back into the tool and ask it to translate that back to English.
||You are on "Jeopardy!" These are your answers. What are the questions?
||Create a new homonym of any existing word, and define. The new word must be spelled in such a way that is obviously pronounced identically to the original word.
||Make a new word by squishing together two existing words. The constituent words must share at least two letters.
||Come up with a new curse for this millennium.
||Cut and Pastiche
||Create a new, funny headline from the words of any headlines appearing anywhere in today's Post. You cannot subdivide words.
||H H |
||Come up with modern diseases of Washington life.
||5 H |