| WEEK | TITLE | SYNOPSIS | INK Types |
|---|---|---|---|
| 840 | Frittering away the neurons | Give us some more colorfully useful phrases; they don't have to be in the X'ing-the-Y form. | L |
| 715 | Your Mug Here | Send us an idea for a slogan for the back of the new Loser T-shirt. | 3 |
| 637 | Full Steam Ahead | Write a steamy passage of a novel that's ostensibly by some well-known person who isn't a novelist. | H |
| 625 | Haven't Seen It | Make up a new plot for an existing movie title. | H |
| 290 | THE WORLD THEORIES | Codify some of life's more populist theories. | H H |
| 283 | UH-OH | Come up with "uh-oh" lines, statements that occur in the middle of a seemingly benign speech or conversation, suddenly alerting the listener that he is about to hear some bad news. | H |
| 262 | CAMPAIGN FOR ONE | Design a line for Niels Hoven to deliver in his campaign for a student government office that will wake up a snoozing audience. | H |
| 261 | WHAT IF YOU GIVE IT A TRY II | Alter some crucial moment in history, and then tell us the likely outcome. | H |
| 181 | YOU CAN TAKE IT TO DEBUNK | Take a common slogan or saying and prove it wrong with at least one example. | H |
| 178 | DEEP THROATS | Come up with Deep Thoughts, in the style of Jack Handey of "Saturday Night Live." A Deep Thought is a short, simple, seemingly inspirational observation that winds up being cynical, ironic, or just plain weird. | H |
| 173 | DEAD RECKONING | Propose a question that might be asked by a living celebrity to a famous dead person. You must name the living person, name the dead person, and tell us the question. | 2 |
| 138 | LIST BUT NOT LEAST | Come up with Top-10-style lists for any of the above four subjects. | H |
| 136 | NEW END IN SIGHT | Come up with new endings to make literary classics more suitable for Hollywood in the 1990s. | 3 |
| 133 | LIKE, WOW. | Come up with funny analogies. | H |
| 87 | WEST EASY, ANN | Come up with good things about West Virginia, in 50 words of fewer. | 4 |
| 78 | SEEKING SMART MORONS | Come up with an oxymoron for our times, an expression made bogus by the fact that it combines incompatible, contradictory ideas. | 5 |
| 66 | THE SON-OF-SMITH LAW | In 50 words or fewer, what do we do about the Chuck Smith problem? | H |
| 63 | BAD ABOUT YOU | Come up with a lame idea for a Style Invitational contest, an idea destined to create unfunny results. | H |
| 62 | BAD NEWS BEARERS | Come up with statements one would not want to hear from friends, relatives, service personnel, etc. | H |
| 57 | CALLING THE TOON | Who are these people, and what are they doing? | H |
| 55 | ESCAPE CLAUSES | Send us self-serving moral loopholes through which the enterprising 1990s transgressor can crawl. | 4 |
| 54 | ODD COUPLING | Write comical combinations of famous names, by marriage or other conceit. | H |
| 51 | CAPTION CRUNCH, VOL. II | Supply captions for any of these pictures. | H |
| 49 | A SLALOM OCCASION | Come up with events for a Washington Olympics. They can be winter or summer sports, based on bureaucracy or other themes peculiar to Washington, and must include a brief description of the event. | H |
| 41 | READ-END COLLUSION | Design a Style Invitational bumper sticker to be awarded to all Honorable Mentions. | H |
| 40 | NOT WRONG. JUST INCORRECT. | What's next on the political correctness agenda? | W |
| 39 | WAY OUTSIDE THE LINES | Name a new crayon color for the 1990s, with a description. | H |
| 36 | SCAM ON WRY | Come up with a prank you can play, for fun, profit, or deliverance of a well-needed comeuppance. | 2 |
| 31 | INVITATION TO A DUAL | Divide the world into two types of people. | L |
| 30 | THE RORSCHACH OF THE CROWD | Interpret any of the provided ink blots. | W |
| 22 | STUMP US | Come up with slogans for the 1996 presidential campaign. | L |
| 20 | COMIC RELIEF | Rewrite 60-year-old cartoons, filling in your own balloons, to make them funnier and more timely. | H |
| 17 | REDUCTIO AD ABSURDUM | Come up with an easy way to reduce the federal deficit, in 20 words or fewer. | W H |
| 16 | I AM ADDICTED TO AN ASININE CONTEST. . . | Come up with sleazy new topics for the daytime talks. | H |