PERMANENT INKSTAIN FOR KONRAD SCHWOERKE
This is what you've done, each Week. I arrange the rows in reverse chronological order, because there are some Losers, and they know who they are, who check up on my points-awarding every Week.But I would just like to reiterate that such checking up is not a problem for me. I have said many times that each Loser's enlightened self-interest is my best QA.
If you wish to see what your ink was, refer to the Master Contest List or search All Invitational Text. Remember that Types I, P, some H, and sometimes A are seen "above the Report" -- that is, if they are listed here for Week 7777, for example, they will be found in text files or images of Week 7777. Everything else will be found in a "Report" section of a file two, three, or four weeks later; 7781 in this Example.
If you see any error, please let me know, firstname.lastname@example.org.
Key to Ink Types:
- H: Honorable Mention, sometimes appearing in the setup of a new contest.
||What have we here?
||Tell us what one or more of these objects really are.
||Stick it to us with a magnet
||Suggest a new Style Invitational honorable-mention magnet.
||An iffy proposition
||Suggest some humorous action that you would take if you were in someone's position, more or less in the form "If I were _____ my first act would be _____."
||A(t)tribute to your wit
||Alter a well-known quote slightly and attribute it to someone else.
||Alter some moment in history and tell us -- in no more than about 50 words -- the likely outcome.
||Write a caption, or captions, for one or more of the provided cartoons.
||Write a "univocalic" newspaper headline -- one that uses only one vowel throughout.
||Clue us in
||Come up with creative, funny clues for the words and multi-word terms in the provided grid.
||It's a ... a ...
||Create a new superhero (or duo) and describe the superpower, or not-very-superpower.
||Take a line from any well-known poem and pair it with your own second line to make a humorous couplet.
||We move on back
||Move the first letter in a word or name to the end of that word and define the resulting word.
MOST OF YOUR INK
Here is, I hope, most of your ink to be found in the All Invitational Text list. I have to find these with what are called regular expressions, which is a method used in a lot of programming languages to find and modify certain text strings in larger corpora. Basically I look for something like this:
"Report From Week 758"
"And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . ."
and then some text, your name, and your town, arranged in this familiar way:"GlaxoSmithKline: I have six kids named Chesterfield, Winston, Lark, BensonHedges, Doral and Kool. If I name my new baby Nicorette, can I get a free coupon for your products? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)"I don't catch everything, but I believe I find 90%.
Unlike in the table to the left, I've arranged these in chronological order, so you can see how your humor matured, like a forgotten cheese deep in the walls of an old house. You started out, perhaps in Year 1, sending in riddles you sort of remembered from grade school, and now look at ya, ain't you Dorothy Parker.
[still working on this ...]