PERMANENT INKSTAIN FOR SUSAN REESE

This is what you've done, each Week. I arrange the rows in reverse chronological order, because there are some Losers, and they know who they are, who check up on my points-awarding every Week.

But I would just like to reiterate that such checking up is not a problem for me. I have said many times that each Loser's enlightened self-interest is my best QA.

If you wish to see what your ink was, refer to the Master Contest List or search All Invitational Text. Remember that Types I, P, some H, and sometimes A are seen "above the Report" -- that is, if they are listed here for Week 7777, for example, they will be found in text files or images of Week 7777. Everything else will be found in a "Report" section of a file two, three, or four weeks later; 7781 in this Example.

If you see any error, please let me know, elden.carnahan@gmail.com.

Key to Ink Types:

WKTITLESYNOPSISINK TYPES
502 Picture This Who are these people? What are they doing? H
499 What Kind of Foal Am I? Mate any two of the horses qualifying for this year's Triple Crown and tell us the name of their foal. Maximum 18 characters, including spaces. 4
489 Combo, First Blood Combine two people whose names contain a common element, as in the examples above. Then describe the person, or provide a quote he or she might have uttered. H
375 Show Us Up Combine the names of two existing TV shows (past or present) to make an entirely new show. Then, describe the show. H
372 Trial Balloons Fill in the balloons. H
352 A Laff Riot Take the name of a company and/or its commercial product and provide it a new definition. H
349 Orienting Oneself Produce a haiku using only words found in today's Washington Post. Your entry must have three lines, the first containing exactly five syllables, the second containing exactly seven syllables, the third containing exactly five. 1
348 When We're LXIV Fashion an entry by selecting one from each of the provided menu groups. 1 H
344 What Kind of Foal Am I? Envision the mating of any two of the 387 horses qualifying for this year's Triple Crown, and propose a name for their foal. The foal's name must be contained in 18 or fewer letters and spaces. H
343 Eastwood Ho. Create a Good-Bad-Ugly progression. H
339 Campaignful Developments Come up with signs that a presidential campaign might be in trouble. H H
329 THE STYLE INVITATIONAL: HELL Take the name of a person or institution. Find within it a hidden message. You may add spacing and punctuation, but you may not move letters around. H H
328 NICE CAPADES Send in some pleasant observation, in which you take a really cheerful or heartwarming view of something that less charitable people might conceivably see differently. H
320 WHAT KIND OF FOAL AM I? Mate any two of the horses qualifying for the Triple Crown races and come up with appropriate names for their foals. Maximum 18 letters and spaces. 4 H H
318 HYPHEN THE TERRIBLE Combine the first half of any hyphenated word in a story in today's paper with the second part of a different hyphenated word from the same story, and provide a new definition. 3
316 CALLING THE TOON What are these things? 1
315 FERMENTING TROUBLE Write a rhyming poem, eight lines maximum, on the subject of cheese or any of the provided items. H
314 IT'S THE LIST YOU CAN DO Start with the name of a famous person, living or dead, real or fictional, either a full name or partial name. Progress through a series of other names or phrases. Each name or phrase must be related to the prior item either by being a homophone or a definition. Eventually, arrive at a name or a phrase that is an appropriate pairing with the original name. H
310 IT'S LIKE THIS Come up with really lame analogies. 2 H
305 ASK BACKWARDS CMXVI2 You are on "Jeopardy!" These are the answers. What are the questions? 1
304 TIME OF THE SIGNS Come up with appropriate signage to appear outside any business or retail establishment in the Washington area, including government offices. H
300 A BRAND NEW CONTEST Come up with celebrity-brand products. H
296 BILL US LATER Choose among the names of any of the newly elected U.S. senators or representatives and propose a bill they might sponsor. H H
291 HYPHEN THE TERRIBLE Take any story in today's paper, find a word that breaks with a hyphen at the end of a line, and combine it with the second half of different hyphenated word in the same story. Then supply a definition for the new hybrid word. H W
290 THE WORLD THEORIES Codify some of life's more populist theories. H
272 PICTURE THIS What is happening in these cartoons? H
263 THE GAME OF THE NAME Propose a bad name for the provided categories. H
259 SPARE EXCHANGE, BUDDY? Take any phone number of any business or government office in the Washington area, translate the first two digits into their constituent letters and propose any appropriate one-word exchange. H
258 IT'S A BIRD. IT'S A PAIN. Choose one or more of the provided super powers and tell us what you would do with it. H
255 SCANDAL IN THE WIND Each of the provided items is somehow related to the current presidential scandal. Tell us how. H
251 QUOTH THE MAVEN Take any famous line, change it by one letter only (add, subtract or change a single letter), and reattribute it. H H
250 OH, GREAT Complete the sentence "Wouldn't it be great if " H
241 CAN YOU BEAT THIS? Come up with headlines describing the defeat of one pro team by another. H
238 CHALK IT UP TO STUPIDITY Propose apologies for yourself in the style of Bart Simpson writing on his blackboard. H
236 CALLING THE TOON. What is happening here? H H
234 THE JOKE'S ON YOU Complete any of the provided jokes as it would be told by someone famous, living or dead. H
232 PRIMAL URGES Update, for the millennium, the old "A is for Apple" reading primer. An entry must include the four letters in one of these blocks: A-D, E-H, I-L, M-P, Q-T, U-Z. H
224 DRAWING CONCLUSIONS What is wrong with these pictures? H H
219 VERBOSITY Come up with new, obnoxious, self-conscious faux verbs and use them in sentences. H
216 WHAT KIND OF FOAL AM I? Pair up any two of the 400-plus horses who have qualified for this year's Triple Crown races, and name their foal, in a maximum of 18 characters, including spaces. 1 H
208 SEND IN THE CLONES Suggest questions a commission to investigate the moral, legal and practical question raised by cloning might consider. H
199 WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE? Tell us the difference between any two of the provided items. H
197 DAVE'S WORLD Make David Twenhafel laugh. Any sort of delightful drollery or amusing witticism will do, so long as it is not the sort of lowbrow fare we usually favor. H H
193 ASK BACKWARDS VIII You are on "Jeopardy!" Here are the answers. What are the questions? H
192 HILL'S BILLS Come up with bills any of the new members of Congress might jointly sponsor. H
188 BLANKETY BLANKS Complete any of the above sentences, substituting your own phrases for the well-known omitted words. 1 H H
187 RACE TO THE FINISH LINE In 75 words or fewer, continue in a productive fashion the story line of the provided real first lines of famous literary works. W
186 CALLING THE TOON Who are these people? What are they doing? H H
183 COCKNEY RHYMING SLANG II Create hawkers' rhymes for modern-day occupations like lobbyists, lawyers, talk show hosts, actuaries, etc., at a maximum of four lines. It must contain at least one rhyme. 3
180 WHEN IN DOUBT, PUN Take any headline in today's Post and improve it by somehow turning it into a pun. H
177 SOUNDS LIKE TROUBLE Tell us what any of the provided sounds are. H
173 DEAD RECKONING Propose a question that might be asked by a living celebrity to a famous dead person. You must name the living person, name the dead person, and tell us the question. 1
172 POEDTRY An entire poetic form, making its global debut in the Style Invitational. The first line must contain only six words of one syllable each; the second line, three words of two syllables each; the third line, two words of three syllables each, and the final line a single word of six syllables. At least two lines must rhyme. The general subject matter should be mundane. H
169 DIFF'RENT JOKES Tell us the difference between any two of the provided items. 2
168 LICENSE TO CARRY A PUN Come up with original jokes like those provided. H
164 MEAN MEANINGS Translate things politicians say into what they really mean. H
150 TRIAL BALLOONS What are the people saying? H H
145 LOOIE, LOOIE Come up with paired, themed ladies' room and men's room signs for various types of public places. W

MOST OF YOUR INK

Here is, I hope, most of your ink to be found in the All Invitational Text list. I have to find these with what are called regular expressions, which is a method used in a lot of programming languages to find and modify certain text strings in larger corpora. Basically I look for something like this:

"Report From Week 758"

or

"And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . ."

and then some text, your name, and your town, arranged in this familiar way:

"GlaxoSmithKline: I have six kids named Chesterfield, Winston, Lark, BensonHedges, Doral and Kool. If I name my new baby Nicorette, can I get a free coupon for your products? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)"

I don't catch everything, but I believe I find 90%.

Unlike in the table to the left, I've arranged these in chronological order, so you can see how your humor matured, like a forgotten cheese deep in the walls of an old house. You started out, perhaps in Year 1, sending in riddles you sort of remembered from grade school, and now look at ya, ain't you Dorothy Parker.





[still working on this ...]