PERMANENT INKSTAIN FOR DAN RAMISH
This is what you've done, each Week. I arrange the rows in reverse chronological order, because there are some Losers, and they know who they are, who check up on my points-awarding every Week.But I would just like to reiterate that such checking up is not a problem for me. I have said many times that each Loser's enlightened self-interest is my best QA.
If you wish to see what your ink was, refer to the Master Contest List or search All Invitational Text. Remember that Types I, P, some H, and sometimes A are seen "above the Report" -- that is, if they are listed here for Week 7777, for example, they will be found in text files or images of Week 7777. Everything else will be found in a "Report" section of a file two, three, or four weeks later; 7781 in this Example.
If you see any error, please let me know, firstname.lastname@example.org.
Key to Ink Types:
- W: Win, whether of the regular contest or the auxiliary contests.
- 2: 2nd Runner-Up; this is second in esteem after the Win, and earns a Loser the crappy prize that used to go to the Winner.
- 3: 3rd Runner-Up.
- H: Honorable Mention, sometimes appearing in the setup of a new contest.
||Write a humorous caption for any of the provided Bob Staake cartoons.
||Weather or nuts
||Coin a term relating to the weather, climate, etc. -- either literal or figurative -- and define it.
||Clue us in
||Come up with up to 25 creative, funny clues for the words and multi-word terms that appear in the provided grid.
||You supply the questions to as many of the provided answers as you like.
||H H |
||Describe a TV reality show featuring a celebrity pursuing some unlikely endeavor.
||H H |
||No Googlenopes left
||Come up with a humorous Googlenope.
||H H |
||Name a real product or company and supply a stupid question or complaint for the consumer hotline person.
||Spit the Difference
||How are any of the items on the list above alike or different?
||That's the Ticket!
||Explain why any of the items on the list below is qualified to be President of the United States.
||Splice Work If You Can Get It
||Combine two words -- overlapping by at least two letters -- into what's known by polysyllabic types as a portmanteau word, and by the rest of us as mash word, and define it.
||Can You Up Chuck?
||Come up with entirely new and funny Chuck Norris Facts.
||Look This Up in Your Funk & Wagnalls
||Supply the pair of terms listed at the top of a page of any print dictionary to indicate the first and last listings on the page, and define that hyphenated term.
||Describe any of these Googlewhacks in the form of a question, "Jeopardy"-style.
||Take Another 'Whack
||Send us a phrase of two or more words that produces exactly one Web page on the Google search engine and describe the phrase.
||H H H |
||Hot Off The Riddle
||Supply a simple riddle and both the wholesome answer and the (printable) Invitational answer.
||Opus 266, No. 3
||Take any common word or two-word term beginning with any letter from A through H and give it a new definition.
||H H |
||Boeing Us Silly
||Suggest some comical ways to improve air travel, either in general or for yourself.
||Hurry Up and Slow Down!
||Suggest particular ways that would slow life down, or ways that would speed it up.
||Clue Us In
||Give us a whole new set of clues to a crossword puzzle penned by Ace Constructor Paula Gamache.
||Well, What Do You Know?
||Tell us what Major Life Lessons can be derived from any of these venues or situations.
MOST OF YOUR INK
Here is, I hope, most of your ink to be found in the All Invitational Text list. I have to find these with what are called regular expressions, which is a method used in a lot of programming languages to find and modify certain text strings in larger corpora. Basically I look for something like this:
"Report From Week 758"
"And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . ."
and then some text, your name, and your town, arranged in this familiar way:"GlaxoSmithKline: I have six kids named Chesterfield, Winston, Lark, BensonHedges, Doral and Kool. If I name my new baby Nicorette, can I get a free coupon for your products? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)"I don't catch everything, but I believe I find 90%.
Unlike in the table to the left, I've arranged these in chronological order, so you can see how your humor matured, like a forgotten cheese deep in the walls of an old house. You started out, perhaps in Year 1, sending in riddles you sort of remembered from grade school, and now look at ya, ain't you Dorothy Parker.
[still working on this ...]