PERMANENT INKSTAIN FOR MARK RAFFMAN

This is what you've done, each Week. I arrange the rows in reverse chronological order, because there are some Losers, and they know who they are, who check up on my points-awarding every Week.

But I would just like to reiterate that such checking up is not a problem for me. I have said many times that each Loser's enlightened self-interest is my best QA.

If you wish to see what your ink was, refer to the Master Contest List or search All Invitational Text. Remember that Types I, P, some H, and sometimes A are seen "above the Report" -- that is, if they are listed here for Week 7777, for example, they will be found in text files or images of Week 7777. Everything else will be found in a "Report" section of a file two, three, or four weeks later; 7781 in this Example.

If you see any error, please let me know, elden.carnahan@gmail.com.

Key to Ink Types:

WKTITLESYNOPSISINK TYPES
1291 Film flam -- movie anagrams Rearrange the letters of a title of a movie or play to make a new title, then describe the new work. H
1288 Your resukts may vary Write a funny disclaimer or warning for some product or service. H M
1287 It's parody time: Oldies for newsies Write some song lyrics about something in the news these days, set to a familiar tune. 4
1286 Mind your P's and B's (and more) Replace one or more P's in a word, name, or multi-word term with a B or with another letter and define or describe the results. H H H H
1285 That is so wrong! Supply a trivia question along with both the correct answer and a cleverly "wrong" guess. H
1283 Put it in Bee-verse Write a humorous poem of eight lines or fewer that includes one of the provided words, all from the 2018 National Spelling Bee. H W
1282 Picture This Write a caption for one or more of the provided pictures. H
1280 A la'ugh' a minute with 'air quotes' Highlight part of a word, name or short phrase in "air quotes" to give it a new meaning or description. H
1279 Just do it -- the 'real' way List some "accurate" directions for using some product or completing some tak. H W
1278 Colt following: The 'grandfoals' "Breed" any two of the 68 foal names that got ink this week, and name the offspring to reflect both parents' names, in the style of today's inking entries. H H H H H
1276 What 4? A limerick contest Use a limerick using one of the provided lines as Line 5. H
1275 That is the question Choose a line from Shakespeare (or a significant part of a line) and pair it with a question that the line could humorously answer. H H
1273 Restocking the Cabinet Explain why a particular person -- or thing -- ought to fill a Cabinet post or other U.S. government position. H
1272 The hex files: creative curses Come up with a creative curse. H
1271 Yodel Doyle's praises with a D-O-Y-L-E neologism Coin a new word or phrase that contains the letters D, O, Y, L and E. H H
1270 The Style Invitational turns 5 x 5 Write a witty poem, on any subject, in any of these forms:
A. Five lines of five syllables each
B. Five lines of five words each
C. Five lines of iambic pentameter
H
1269 Mess with our (or other) heads Reinterpret (or comments wryly on) a headline appearing in The Post (print or online) or another publication and dated March 1-12 by writing a bank head. H H
1268 Playing pinocchio Tell us some humorously bogus trivia about the news media or the publishing or broadcasting industries. H H
1267 Jingle bungle Suggest an ill-advised spokesman (dead or alive, or fictional), along with a humorously noooo slogan or jingle. H H
1266 The Tile Invitational V Create a five-, six-, or seven-letter word (or phrase) by scrambling the letters of any of the sets and define it. H
1265 Parody for the course Write a song relating to a class or course of instruction, or to school in general. 4 H H I
1264 A cry for Yelp: 'Review' any place Write a humorous review, positive or negative, of anyplace (real of fictional) one might visit. W
1263 Playing the short game Using the three-letter Olympic national abbreviations and/or the abbreviation for any college, tell what would happen if one abbreviated team played another. 2 H H
1262 Clue us in -- a backward crossword Supply one or more creative clues for the provided filled-in crossword grid -- as many as 25 clues in all. 4 H H H H
1261 Post mortems -- our annual obit poem contest Write a humorous poem of no longer than eight lines about someone who died in 2017. H H H H
1260 What lies (are) ahead for 2018 Jokingly predict some news event to happen in 2018. H H H
1259 Beat the banned with euphemisms Come up with creative euphemisms for the provided words, or for other words that might offend someone or other. H H H
1258 The year in redo, Part 2 Enter (or reenter) any Style Invitational contest from Week 1230 through Week 1254. H H
1257 The year in redo, Part 1 Enter (or re-enter) any Style Invitational contest from Week 1203 through Week 1229, except for Weeks 1205 and 1206. H H H H
1256 Picture this -- a caption contest Provide a funny caption for any of the provided cartoons. H W
1255 Tour de Fours XIV: SANT is coming Coin a word or multi-word term that contains the letter-block S-A-N-T; the letters may be in any order, but there may be no other letters between them. 2
1254 Inkorporation--a change-one-letter contest Change the name of a present or past business, store or agency (not just a product) by adding one letter, deleting one letter, transposing two letters or substituting one letter for another. H
1253 Fashion x fiction: More fake trivia Tell us some totally bogus trivia about clothing or fashion. H H H
1252 It's a med, med, med, med world Invent a clever name for a new medical product, and specify the condition it would treat. 3
1251 Thanking outside the box Tell us something to be thankful for. H
1250 Poems of the year(s) Write a humorous poem incorporating three or more terms from a particular year or era listed on Time Traveler. H H H W
1249 Ask Backwards 36 Choose any of the 15 provided items and follow it with a question that it could humorously answer. H H H
1246 Questionable journalism Find any sentence (or a substantive part of a sentence) that appears in The Post or another publication, in print or online, dated Sept. 21-Oct. 2, and pair it with a question it might answer. 2 H H H
1245 Call us reprehensible … Complain in a humorously missing-the-point way about something that has appeared in The Washington Post (in print or online) recently, or in another publication. H H
1244 Primed for product reviews Send us a creative "review" for any of the provided items that are listed on Amazon. H
1243 We bid you: No T-R-U-M-P Coin a new term, or choose an existing one, whose letters do not include a T, R, U, M, or P, and write a humorous definition. H H H H I W
1240 We GIVE you Limerixicon XIV Supply a humorous, previously unpublished limerick significantly featuring any English word, name or term beginning with "gh-" or "gi-". 4 H H
1239 MASH 3  Combine two movie titles and  describe the result. 4
1238 D-E-F Comedy Jam (or E-D-F, etc.)  Coin a three­word phrase (you may add an insignificant word or two)  whose words begin with D, E and F — in any order — and describe it. H H H
1237 Our alliteracy campaign Rewrite an existing headline from any  publication, print or online — about something in the  news from July 20 to 31, by using alliteration. H
1236 Portmanteaux faux Explain--inaccurately but amusingly--how a real word is a combination of two or more words, with an illustrative sentence, as in the provided examples, or some other funny way. 4 H H H H
1235 The Sound of Science Write humorous lyrics on the subject of science or technology, set to a well-known tune. 2 I
1234 It's incontestable Four weeks from now, the Empress will have just placed  her dainty imperial toe back on our glittering shores.  Which means that for the first time since January 2002,  almost 800 contests ago — back during the late reign of  her predecessor, the Czar — the Invitational will skip two  contests in a row. H H
1233 Not The Loser Community  gets a week off (actually  two) from writing contest  entries and will have to  find something else to do  during staff meetings,  sermons, romantic  breakups, etc. H H H
1232 Picture this -- a caption contest Write a caption for one or more of the provided cartoons. 3 H H H
1231 TankaWanka 3: Haiku Plus Tu Write a TankaWanka about something that's been in the news lately. The poem must consist of five lines of 5, 7, 5, 7 and 7 syllables in that order. And at least two of the lines must rhyme. H H
1230 What in creation . . . ? Supply a brief monologue or dialogue about a Creator's specifications or planning for some living being. H
1229 Gorey bits from A to Z Send us one of more edgy rhyming alphabet-primer couplets. H H
1227 Celebrate ortho-diversity! Name and describe a new life form -- and no letter in the term may be used twice. 3 H H H
1226 Colt following: The 'grandfoals' "Breed" any two of the 61 foal names that got ink this week, and name the offspring to reflect both parents names. H H
1225 The Ideas of March Suggest a march for some group or field, along with one or more slogans. (You might also, or instead, comment on the march with some pertinent wordplay.) H H H
1223 Post again out to mislead public! Write a humorously sensationalistic, misleading headline on an otherwise mundane article or ad published in The Post or elsewhere from April 13 to April 24. H
1222 Foaling around "Breed" any two of the provided racehorses nominated for this year's Kentucky Derby, Preakness and Belmont; and name the foal to reflect both of them. H H H
1221 Who's kidding whom? Take two people from history, past or present, and tell what their child would be like H
1220 O pedantry, O pedantry Give us some humorous pedantry. 3
1219 Cast your Bred upon us Write a Lik the Bred verse about someone in the news lately. H H
1218 Mess with our -- or anyone else's -- heads Reinterpret (or comment wryly on) a headline appearing in the Post (print or online or another publication dated March 9-20) by writing a bankhead, or subtitle. H H
1217 Mergers you wrote: Combine two businesses with puns Give a clever name for a combination of two or more businesses. H H
1216 As the word turns Create a word or multi-word term that consists of adjacent letters -- in any direction or several directions -- in the provided grid, and provide a humorous definition. H
1215 A so-so contest (How so-so is it?) Write a humorous exaggeration in the form "x is so y that …" H H H H
1214 The alternaugural address Write a humorous passage — a “quote,” an observation, a joke, a dialogue, a poem, anything — using only words that appear in Trump’s inaugural address. 3 H
1213 Punku Write a haiku that incorporates a pun. H
1212 The Tile Invitational IV  Give us a five-, six- or seven-letter word (or two words) by scrambling the letters of any of the provided sets and define it. H H H H H P
1210 Send us the bill: Our 'joint legislation' game Combine two or more names from the provided list of members of Congress to “co-sponsor” a bill based on their combined last names, and state its purpose. H H
1209 Invented facts: A fictoid contest Tell us a humorously untrue account of how a product or invention came to be, or got its name. H H
1208 A RIP-roaring year: Obit poems Write a humorous poem of no longer than eight lines about someone who died in 2016. H H H
1207 Clue us in -- a reverse crossword Supply clever, funny clues to up to 25 of the 72 words and multi-word terms in the provided grid. H H H H
1206 Do-over the do-over -- enter any of the year's contests Enter (or re-enter) any Style Invitational contest from Week 1149 to 1202, except for Week 1152, last year's do-over. H H
1205 Could we just have a do-over? Yes, we could. Enter (or re-enter) any Style Invitational contest from Week 1149 to 1201, except for Week 1152, last year's do-over. 4 H
1204 Well, at least … Note some good news for the coming year to comfort -- or "comfort" -- those who are depressed about the change of presidential administration. T
1203 You've got the powers Tell us what you would do if you had one or more of the six magical powers provided. H
1202 Don't be afraid of the dark Write lyrics to a song that, in some way, express hope. 3 H
1201 Tour de Fours XIII: What's there to NOVE? Coin a word or multi-word term that contains the letter block N-O-V-E. H
1198 Give it to us straight Take any sentence from an article or ad in any publication dated Oct. 20 to Oct. 31 — or from an online article dated within that period — and translate it into “plain English,” H
1197 Picture This -- It's a Bob Staake caption contest Write a caption for any of the cartoons provided. H
1196 Hyphen the Terrible Combine either half of a hyphenated word or compound term with either half of another such term to create a new hyphenated term, and describe the result humorously. H H
1195 Don't change a letter! Alter a movie title only by changing word spacing, changing capitalization, and adding or deleting punctuation marks, accents, etc., then describe the result. H H
1194 Nyetymologies: fake word origins Provide a humorously untrue explanation for the derivation of a word. H H
1193 Poedtry Write a Poed, which consists of four lines: The first line contains six one-syllable words. The second line contains three two-syllable words. The third line contains two three-syllable words. The fourth line contains one six-syllable word (or a name totaling six syllables.  And at least two of the lines must rhyme. H H H
1191 Mess with our heads Reinterpret (or comment wryly on) a headline appearing in The Post (print or online) and dated Sept. 1-12 by writing a bank head, or subtitle 3 H
1189 Gee, it's Limerixicon XIII! Supply a humorous, previously unpublished limerick significantly featuring any English word, name or term beginning with "ge'". H
1187 Just drop it, okay? Drop the last letter from an existing word, phrase or name and define the result. 2 H
1186 We're always happy to verse you  Write a humorous poem, of any form, about or “by” the anagram of anyone’s name. H
1185 The Rorschach of the crowd Interpret one of more of the provided genuine inkblots. You may look at them upside down or sideways. H H H
1184 Plan C -- a third candidate? Explain why some novel person (or thing) should be president; you could also suggest a president-veep ticket. H
1182 Where in the wor(l)d? (1) On What3words.com, find one or more humorously appropriate (or ironic) three-word codes at a particular place; or 2) find a three-word code, tell us where it is, and tell us what ought to be there. H
1181 Put it in Bee-verse Write a short, humorous poem using one of the 36 provided words, all from the 2016 National Spelling Bee. H H
1180 Strip search! Find a line of text from any comic strip or panel that appears on the Post's comics pages or on washingtonpost.com/comics, dated anywhere between June 16 and June 27, and either (a) supply a question that the original line could answer, or (b) follow it with your own line of dialogue or reply. H H H
1179 Blasted alphabetical contests . . . Coin a three-word phrase whose words begin with A, B and C -- in any order -- and describe it. H H
1178 A ______ of collective nouns Propose one or more funny new names for groups of things. H
1177 The ballad box Write a song related to this year's elections, set to a familiar tune. H H
1176 Let 'er RIP: Write and obit line Write a humorous line or two for someone's obituary -- either for a particular person (dead or not) or for a fictional or generic one. H
1175 Good luck with 13 Make up a word whose Scrabble letter values add up to exactly 13, and define it. H I
1173 Tinker with the recipe Slightly change the name of a food or brand of food (or something else in the food industry) and describe it, or write a slogan, jingle, etc. H
1172 Pieces of 'Pie' Write a short passage -- an observation, a joke, a dialogue, a poem, anything -- using only words that appear in the song "American Pie". 3 H H
1171 What's my (next) line? Take a line from any song and pair it with your own second line to make a humorous rhyming couplet; the second line should match the rhythm of the first, rather than the second line of the song itself. 2 4 H
1168 Asterisky business Tell us an original joke whose punchline can't be understood without knowledge -- not necessarily scientific -- that most of us don't have (which you'll supply with a concise explanation). H H
1167 So what's to liken? Take any two items from the provided list and explain how they're similar or different, or connect the some other way. H
1166 Questionable journalism Take a sentence (or most of a sentence) that appears in text (not a headline) in The Washington Post or on washingtonpost.com dated March 10-21 and make up a question that the sentence could answer 3 H H H
1163 Put it in reverse Spell a word, name or phrase backward and define the result in a way that relates to the original. H
1161 Give us four Pinocchios Tell us some false "facts" about politicians, present or past. H H H
1160 A remeaning task Redefine an existing word or two-word term beginning with P through Z. H H H H
1159 It's all in the game Come up with a funny/ridiculous board-type game and describe it. H
1157 Clue us in -- a backward crossword Supply clever, funny clues to up to 25 of the words and multi-word terms in the provided grid. H
1156 Dead letters Write a humorous poem of no longer than eight line about someone who died in 2015. H H
1154 Tabby Road -- songs for cats Write a song for -- or about -- cats or other animals, set to a familiar tune. 2 H H
1153 Be three-paired Choose two or more entities represented by a single three-letter combination from IAA through LZZ, found at the provided link, and say how they are alike or different or have some connection. H H H
1152 Oops? You do it again. Enter any Style Invitational contest from Week 1098 through Week 1148, except for Week 1101, last year's do-over. H
1151 To [a glass], snarkly Write a short, snarky (but witty) note to one of the provided glassbowls. H
1150 A deviant character Change the name of person or animal -- real or fictional -- by adding or subtracting one letter; substituting one letter for another; or switching the positions of two nearby letters, and describing the results. H H H
1149 Gestures of depreciation Suggest ways to celebrate National Love Your Lawyer Day -- or a made-up "holiday" celebrating some other profession. 2 H I
1148 It's TankaWanka II Write a TankaWanka about something that's been in the news lately. The poem must consist of five lines of 5, 7, 5, 7 and 7 syllables in that order. And it must include at least one rhyme. H
1147 It's E-Z find-a-word -- yours Create a word or multi-word term that consists of adjacent letters -- in any direction or several directions -- in the provided grid, and provide a humorous definition. H
1146 Stick it to us with a magnet Suggest a new Style Invitational honorable-mention magnet. H
1144 Someone else's business Name a real brand, along with something else it would be a better name for. H H
1143 Ask Backwards Provided are 15 answers, separated by asterisks. You supply the questions. H H H H H
1142 Two-faced tweets Combine two well-known names into a Twitter handle, and write a tweet (no more than 140 characters and spaces) that that portmanteau person might write. H
1141 Mess with our heads Reinterpret (or comment wryly on) a headline appearing in the Post (print or online) Sept. 17-28 by writing a bankhead, or subtitle. H H H
1140 You're giving us a bad name Cite a REAL brand name, past or present, note it original use, and then say what sort of product, organization, etc., that name would be bad for. H
1139 A little sixty-four play Fashion an entry by selecting one element from each of the provided menu groups. Make sure you indicate the combination you chose (e.g., 2-C-iii). W
1138 Show us your touché Offer an elegantly snide (and original) of anyone living or dead. H
1137 Be a published author! Give us a spicy title for a boring book, real or imagined. 2 H
1136 Gaah! It's Limerixicon XII Supply a humorous, previously unpublished limerick significantly featuring any English word, name or term beginning with "ga-". H
1135 The meter's running Suggest actions in daily life that should require a time limit -- maximum or minimum -- and come with an appropriate penalty for running over (or under). 3 H H
1133 Are 'hew ready? A contest for clerihews A clerihew is a humorous four-line rhyming poem about a person whose name is mentioned in the first line; in fact, the name must be at the end of that line (or constitute the whole line) so that it has to rhyme with something. The rhyme structure (and we don't want "lazy" rhymes) is AABB: the first line rhymes with the second, the third with the fourth. H H H H H
1132 You and what army? Military fictoids Give us some comically bogus trivia about the military, past or present, ours or theirs. H
1131 One man's trash Suggest a humorous way to reuse one or more of the items listed above -- or anything else advertised on RepurposedMaterialsinc.com. 3
1130 Yux Redux: Play on a foreign phrase Make a word play on a foreign phrase or term (or English phrase using foreign words) and describe it. H
1129 Right in the pampootie Write a humorous short poem (eight lines or fewer) incorporating one of the 50 provided words. H
1128 Drone for a loop Give us some novel uses for a CICADA micro-drone, assuming that anyone can get one, and that it can have a micro-camera, micro-grips, etc. H
1127 From the creators of … Think up a spinoff of a real TV series, past or present, and furnish a description of bit of dialogue. 4 H H W
1126 Picture this Provide a humorous caption for any of the cartoons provided. H T
1125 The song remains the sa Supply a real song title that has the end or beginning -- or, what the heck, both -- chopped off and describe it. H H
1124 Heed! Indeed: Advice verse Write one of the provided reminders as a humorous poem of eight lines or fewer. H
1123 The Tile Invitational III Give us a five-, six-, or seven-letter word (or two words) by scrambling the letters of any of the provided seven-letter sets. H H H H
1121 The an(n)als of civilization Briefly describe some "bad day in history" -- you may be creative in what you classify as such -- and sum it up with a humorous heading. H H H
1119 We want hue so bad Invent a name for a color and describe it. H H H
1118 Breed 'em and weep Breed any two of the provided 100 racehorses nominated for this year's Triple Crown events and name the foal the reflect both names. H
1117 You got another sing coming Write a song about a topic or person lately in the news, set to a familiar tune. 4
1116 Punning in place Create a new term using only the letters in a place name. You don't have to use all the letters, but you can't use a letter more often than it appears in the word. 2 3
1115 Our type o' headline Change a headline in an article or ad in the Washington Post and then add a "bank head" or subtitle. H H
1114 Awww together now Write us a humorous headline -- from the past, present, or future -- that puts an optimistic perspective on some otherwise not-so-promising news. H H W
1113 Our occasional parodies Write a song celebrating someone's birthday or other personal occasion (rather than, say, a holiday), set to a familiar tune. H
1112 Some SHARP words Coin a word or short term that includes all the letters S, H, A, R, and P. 3 H H
1111 When you riff upon a store Use a wordplay on a song title as a name or slogan for a real or imagined business. H
1110 The mama of all humor Write a [Someone’s] Mama joke for some well-known figure, past or present, real or fictional. 3 H
1109 Fictoids of Columbia Tell us some humorously untrue “facts” about Washington, D.C., and the surrounding area. H I
1108 Hearts of dorkness Write a humorous Valentine's Day sentiment to someone (or to some organization), either real or fictional -- either from you or from someone else you name. Plus an all-new option: We'll also be willing to run at least one really funny, clever, well-executed graphic. 2 H H
1107 Send us the bill Combine two or more names from the list of members of Congress on this page to "cosponsor" a bill based on their combined last names, and state its purpose. H H H
1106 Show your resolve Suggest a New Year's resolution that someone might make 100 or more years in the future. H H
1105 A lit obit of fun Write a humorous poem of no longer than eight line about someone who died in 2014. H
1104 A pair of threes Choose two or three entities represented by a single three-letter combination beginning with E- through H- — see the links at bit.ly/abbrevs-e-h — and say how they are alike or different. H H
1103 Themes good enough for us Suggest an existing song to be used as the theme for a TV series or program for comic effect. 3 M
1102 Let's get Sirius Suggest a new radio channel and describe it. H
1101 The year in redo Enter any Style Invitational contest from Week 1047 through Week 1097, except for Week 1050. H H H
1100 Pun and ink -- the feghoot Contrive an elaborate scenario that ends in a novel groaner pun on a familiar expression, title, etc. H
1099 Questionable journalism Take a sentence (or most of a sentence) that appears in an article in The Washington Post or on washingtonpost.com dated Nov. 20 through Dec. 1 (in print, any article from those days' papers), and make up a question that the sentence could answer. H
1098 Prime time for some Amazon reviews Send us a creative "review" for any of the provided items that are listed on Amazon. H
1096 Picture this Write a humorous caption for any of the provided Bob Staake cartoon. H
1095 TankaWanka! Write a TankaWanka about something that's been in the news lately. The poem must consist of five lines of 5, 7, 5, 7 and 7 syllables in that order. And it must include at least one rhyme. H H
1094 TAXI's the fare for Tour de Fours XI Coin a word or hyphenated term that contains the letter block T-A-X-I; the letters may be in any order, but there may be no other letters between them. H H H T
1093 You're only as rich as you fee What are some really bad ideas for various businesses to make a few more bucks? H H H H I
1092 Are we having funds yet? Suggest a humorous fundraising "challenge" for any organization. H
1091 Good idea! or not. Come up with a good idea and, through a small change in wording, a bad idea. H
1089 It's E-Z Find-a-Word -- your own! Create a word or multi-word term that consists of adjacent letters -- in any direction or several directions -- in the provided grid, and provide a humorous definition. W
1088 Ask backwards with our answers, your questions Supply the questions to as many of the 16 supplies answers as you like. H
1087 The core ridiculum Come up with a comical class (any type of school) and provide a course catalog description. H H
1086 Playing the dozens 1. Start with any 12-letter word, name or multi-word phrase.
2. Add one letter OR drop one letter OR substitute another letter OR switch the position of two letters to create a new term, as in the examples given.
3. Define or describe the result humorously.
H
1084 Limerixicon XI: Fi-, fo-, go! Supply a humorous, previously unpublished limerick significantly featuring any English word, name or term beginning with "Fl-" through "fo-". H
1083 Everybody get appy Offer up an idea for either a humorously useful app or a humorously counterproductive one. H H H H
1082 Band on the pun Alter the name of a music group or performer slightly -- not necessarily by just one letter, but enough so it's obvious what the original is -- and describe it in some way. H H H H
1081 It's the stupidity, stupid Write us stupid questions that will make us laugh. H H
1079 Little piddle riddle Ask a question and answer it with a rhyme. H H
1078 Hyphen the Terrible Combine one side of any hyphenated word or compound term with one side of another word to make a new hyphenated term, and define it humorously. Both halves must appear in the same issue of The Post or another print newspaper, or in writing published the same day on washingtonpost.com or another online publication. H
1076 Dactyly fractyly Send us some double dactyls that conform to Gene Weingarten's rules. H H
1075 Falsity is Job One Send us some fictoids about cars and trucks and driving and stuff. 4 H H H
1074 Let's go parody-hopping Describe a stage or movie musical in a parody of a song from a different musical. 3 H
1073 Bank shots: Mess with (y)our heads Quote a headline appearing in the Washington Post, washington.com or another publication, print or headline, dated May 22 to June 1, and supply a bank" headline that either misinterprets it, as in the examples above, or comments wryly on it. H H
1071 A pair of threes Choose two or three entities represented by a single three-letter combination at bit.ly/3letterabs and say how they are alike or different. H
1070 Colt following -- our grandfoals contest "Breed" any two of the foal names that got ink this week, and name the offspring to reflect the parents' names. H
1069 It's a small, small world Write a humorous poem of no more than eight lines -- it doesn't have to rhyme -- using only the top 1,000 words on Wiktionary.org's list of the most common among 20 million words found in movie and TV scripts. H W
1068 An iffy proposition Suggest some humorous action that you would take if you were in someone's position, more or less in the form "If I were _____ my first act would be _____." H
1067 A(t)tribute to your wit Alter a well-known quote slightly and attribute it to someone else. H M
1066 It's mating season "Breed" any two from the provided list of 100 of the 3-year-old racehorses nominated for this year's Triple Crown and name the foal to reflect both names. H H
1064 HistoRebuffs Alter some moment in history and tell us -- in no more than about 50 words -- the likely outcome. H H H
1063 Same difference Take any two items from the provided list and explain how they're similar or different. H H
1062 Scanning the headlines Write a rhyming poem about something currently in the news. H
1061 Less taste, more fill-in Give us a novel clue for any word or phrase in which the remaining letters in the provided crossword puzzle fit, across or down. H H H
1060 Picture this Write a caption, or captions, for one or more of the provided cartoons. H H
1059 With parens like these … Add some words in parentheses to a well-known song title to make it funnier in some way. W
1058 Eastwood Ho Create a good-bad-ugly progression. L
1057 Sportin' lie Give us some fake sports trivia. H
1056 Weather or nuts Coin a term relating to the weather, climate, etc. -- either literal or figurative -- and define it. 2 H
1055 Oh, K! This week, to commemorate both Kevin Dopart and his 1K ink blots: Change a word, phrase of name by adding one or more K's, and define your new term. H
1054 Dead letters Write a short, humorous poem commemorating someone (or maybe even something) who died in 2013. H H
1053 Questionable journalism Quote an actual sentence, from The Washington Post, washingtonpost.com, or another print or online publication dated between Dec. 26 and Jan. 6, and follow it with a question that the sentence might answer. H H H
1052 Clue us in Come up with up to 25 creative, funny clues for the words and multi-word terms that appear in the provided grid. H
1051 Love the tiny tail stain! Create an anagram -- a text with the letters rearranged -- of any text (except merely someone's name), of any length, referring to something or someone in the news. H H H T
1050 Just redo it Enter any Style Invitational contest from Week 1000 through Week 1046. H H H H M
1049 Be rating Come up with a new movie rating and describe it. H
1048 Ask Backwards You supply the questions to as many of the provided answers as you like. H W
1047 Bank shots Quote a headline appearing in The Washington Post, washingtonpost.com or another publication, print or online, dated Nov. 14 to Nov. 25, and supply a humorous "bank" headline that either misinterprets it or comments wryly on it. H H H
1045 Songs for the asking Take a sentence, phrase or title forms a song and provide a funny question it might answer. 2 H H H
1044 Play it safe Come up with a comically safety-conscious rule for the workplace or elsewhere. 2 I
1042 Tour de Fours X: Go SANE Create a new word or two-word term containing the letter block S-A-N-E -- in any order, but consecutively, and define it. H H L
1041 What have you got to lose? Answer a question, real or rhetorical, that appears in a song. H I
1040 IRS my case Schedule A: Suggest a novel way for the government to determine taxes.

Schedule B: Suggest a deduction that you'd like to take, or that some real or fictional person or past or present might like to take.

Schedule C: Suggest a cause you'd rather check off $3 for.

H
1039 Shookespeare Combine any of the words in Hamlet's "To be, or not to be" soliloquy, in any order, to create a humorous sentence or longer passage. H H
1035 The Empy 500 Explain what news Bob Staake is trying to tell in any of the provided drawings. H
1034 What's to like? Supply an original joke of the form "I like my [your choice] the way I like my [something else of your choice]: [some clever, funny parallel]." H H H H
1033 LimeriXicon Supply a humorous limerick significantly featuring any English word, name or term beginning with "fa-". H
1032 Hid stuff Explain the symbolism "obviously" evident in any well-known site, artwork, etc., in 75 words or fewer. 3 H
1031 The 'Sty'le Invitational Choose any word, name, or short term; emphasize a key, suddenly pertinent part of it with quotation marks; then redefine the word. H H
1030 The cinquain feeling Write a clever cinquain. The five-line form is straightforward: first line, two syllables; second line, four syllables; third line, six; fourth line, eight; fifth line, two. H
1029 Ditty Harry Write a descriptive theme song for a well-known movie, set to a well-known tune. H W
1028 Joint Legiflation Combine the names of two or more of the First Congress senators and/or representatives to create "joint legislation". 3 H
1026 'Might' makes ink Give us a joke using any of the using any of the provided "you might be" templates. H H H
1025 In so many words Create an original backronym for a name or other term, especially one that's been in the news lately. H H H H
1024 Gorey thoughts Send us some edgy rhyming alphabet-primer couplets. The pairs are AB, CD, EF, GH, IJ, KL, MN, OP, QR, ST, UV, WX, and YZ. H
1021 'Gram theft Come up with a term by scrambling any of the letters sets in the provided list, and define it. H H
1020 Colt following Breed any two of this week's winning foals and name the grandfoal. H
1019 What a turnoff Tell us some creative things that children and families could do during Screen-Free Week. H
1018 Reologisms Write a clever, funny definition for any of the Loser-concocted neologisms from Week 1014 as well as from Week 1000 that deserve better definitions than their creators offered at the time. H
1017 Vowel play Write a "univocalic" newspaper headline -- one that uses only one vowel throughout. H H
1016 Foaling around Breed any two of the horses nominated for this year's Triple Crown races and give the foal a name humorously reflecting the names of the parents. H
1015 Faux re mi Give us some humorously false trivia about music or musicians. H
1014 Join now Combine the beginning and end, or the beginnings and ends, of any two words in single Washington Post story or ad published March 21 to April 1 into a new word or two-word phrase, and define the result. H H
1013 Har monikers Write a riddle that uses a pun of a person's name in the answer. H
1012 The news at 5 Write a limerick about a recent news event. 2
1011 Top these! Try your hand at any of the contests mentioned in this look back. H H H H
1010 Picture this Write a caption for any of the five provided cartoons. H H H H
1009 What's in a name? Write something about some person, real or fictional, using only the letters in the person's name. H H L
1007 Clue us in Come up with creative, funny clues for the words and multi-word terms in the provided grid. H H
1005 Send us the bill Name a piece of legislation "cosponsored" by two or more of the 98 new House and Senate members provided. H H
1004 Dead letters Write a humorous poem about anyone who died in 2012. H
1001 Make us ROFL Give us a funny, original acronym. H
1000 We now have 4 digits; you now have 7 letters Choose any word, name or two-word term beginning anywhere from T through Z; then add one letter, drop one letter, substitute one letter for another, or transpose two adjacent letters, and define the result. H H H
999 Drectrospective Enter any Style Invitational contest from Week 946 through Week 995, except for Week 948. H
997 Unworthy causes Name a dubious charity and describe its mission. H H W
995 Ask backwards We give you the "answers" and you supply jokes in the form of a question. H W
994 Stick it to us Suggest a slogan for one of our two new honorable-mention Loser Magnets for 2012-2013. H
993 Versus, verses Write a short "rap battle" between any two characters, real or fictional. H
991 Tour de Fours IX Create a new word or two-word term containing the letter block V, O, T, and E and define it. H H H
989 On the double Come up with a double or multiple profession, and explain how each job complements the other(s). H
984 Another brilliant contest Write something whose words begin with consecutive letters of the alphabet. H
983 Limerixicon IX Supply a humorous limerick significantly featuring any English word, name or term beginning with the letters "eq-" through "ez-". H
982 The parody line Set your own, humorous words to the tune of a well-known song--except that you must preserve one of the original lines. H
979 The madding crowd Suggest funny, original ways to tick people off. H

MOST OF YOUR INK

Here is, I hope, most of your ink to be found in the All Invitational Text list. I have to find these with what are called regular expressions, which is a method used in a lot of programming languages to find and modify certain text strings in larger corpora. Basically I look for something like this:

"Report From Week 758"

or

"And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . ."

and then some text, your name, and your town, arranged in this familiar way:

"GlaxoSmithKline: I have six kids named Chesterfield, Winston, Lark, BensonHedges, Doral and Kool. If I name my new baby Nicorette, can I get a free coupon for your products? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)"

I don't catch everything, but I believe I find 90%.

Unlike in the table to the left, I've arranged these in chronological order, so you can see how your humor matured, like a forgotten cheese deep in the walls of an old house. You started out, perhaps in Year 1, sending in riddles you sort of remembered from grade school, and now look at ya, ain't you Dorothy Parker.





[still working on this ...]