||Call us reprehensible …
||Complain in a humorously missing-the-point way about something that has appeared in The Washington Post (in print or online) recently, or in another publication.
||We'll call them your-mama jokes
||Tell us an original "your mama" joke.
||We WANT stupid complaints!
||Complain comically unreasonably about some innocuous thing appearing in the print Post or on washingtonpost.com over the next week or the previous few days.
||Come up with a fortune cookie line that you'd like to see.
||Fire an actor or actress from a movie or TV show, past or present, and offer a replacement for the role.
||Your mug here
||Give us a new design for the Loser Mug.
||H H |
||We move on back
||Move the first letter in a word or name to the end of that word and define the resulting word.
||We Har the World
||Come up with a creative name for a sports team for a town or city anywhere outside the United States.
||Pay tribute in verse to someone who died in 2003.
||Try, Try Again
||Enter any previous Invitational. Your entry must be substantially different from the original winners.
||H W |
||Come up with a terse review (four words or fewer) of any work of art.
||You are on "Jeopardy!" These are the answers. What are the questions?
||Around Things Moving
||Take the title of any book or movie, rearrange the words, and explain what the new book or movie is about.
||Hyphen the Terrible
||Take the first half of any hyphenated word in today's Washington Post (or Tuesday's USA Today) and combine it with the second half of any other hyphenated word in the same story, and define the new word it produces.
||H H |
||Live On, Sweet, Earnest Reader
||Take the name of any person--living, dead, fictional--and use the letters of his name, in succession, to form the first letters of an expression appropriate to that person.
||Come up with events that have a smaller chance of happening than the Redskins winning the Super Bowl.
||Roling With Laughter
||Take a character from one movie, use him or her to replace a character in a second movie, and then explain how this change would affect the second movie.
||Describe how things might have been different if a famous person, living or dead, had had one of the provided conditions.
||H W |
||Sentence Us to Death
||Take any sentence appearing anywhere in today's Washington Post, and invent a question that it answers.
||2 H H |
||Everyone's a Comic
||Choose any panel of any comic strip in today's Washington Post and improve it by replacing the original speech and thought balloons with your own,
||H W |
||THE STYLE INVITATIONAL: HELL
||Take the name of a person or institution. Find within it a hidden message. You may add spacing and punctuation, but you may not move letters around.
||Look at today's comics pages, select one panel and one panel only from any comic strip, and rewrite the dialogue.
||YOU NAME IT
||Take a well known pair or group of names, extend one of them in some manner, and explain how the group dynamic changes.
||SCANDAL IN THE WIND
||Each of the provided items is somehow related to the current presidential scandal. Tell us how.
||CHALK IT UP TO STUPIDITY
||Propose apologies for yourself in the style of Bart Simpson writing on his blackboard.
||THE JOKE'S ON YOU
||Complete any of the provided jokes as it would be told by someone famous, living or dead.
||H H |
||Suggest a motto for the "tails" side of any of the state-themed quarters.