PERMANENT INKSTAIN FOR SANFORD HORN
This is what you've done, each Week. I arrange the rows in reverse chronological order, because there are some Losers, and they know who they are, who check up on my points-awarding every Week.But I would just like to reiterate that such checking up is not a problem for me. I have said many times that each Loser's enlightened self-interest is my best QA.
If you wish to see what your ink was, refer to the Master Contest List or search All Invitational Text. Remember that Types I, P, some H, and sometimes A are seen "above the Report" -- that is, if they are listed here for Week 7777, for example, they will be found in text files or images of Week 7777. Everything else will be found in a "Report" section of a file two, three, or four weeks later; 7781 in this Example.
If you see any error, please let me know, email@example.com.
Key to Ink Types:
- W: Win, whether of the regular contest or the auxiliary contests.
- 4: 4th Runner-Up.
- H: Honorable Mention, sometimes appearing in the setup of a new contest.
||You are on "Jeopardy!" Here are the answers. You supply one or more of the questions.
||What Kind of Foal Am I?
||Breed any two of the 100 horses eligible for this year's Triple Crown and provide an appropriate name for their foal.
||Mess With Our Heads
||Take any headline, verbatim, appearing anywhere in The Post or on washingtonpost.com from March 15 through 24 and reinterpret it by adding a "bank head," or subtitle.
||H H |
||Slightly change the name of an existing or former TV show to create a program that can scab the writers' strike.
||We Har the World
||Come up with a creative name for a sports team for a town or city anywhere outside the United States.
||Top of the Inking
||Tell us some ways the District of Columbia will change now that we have the Nationals.
||Tell us about certain people's childhood experiences and behaviors that hint at their destinies.
||Pay tribute in verse to someone who died in 2003.
||Try, Try Again
||Enter any previous Invitational. Your entry must be substantially different from the original winners.
||You are on "Jeopardy!" These are your answers. What are the questions?
||Live On, Sweet, Earnest Reader
||Take the name of any person--living, dead, fictional--and use the letters of his name, in succession, to form the first letters of an expression appropriate to that person.
||The Battle of All Mottoes
||Provide a slogan for any federal department agency, department, office, etc.
MOST OF YOUR INK
Here is, I hope, most of your ink to be found in the All Invitational Text list. I have to find these with what are called regular expressions, which is a method used in a lot of programming languages to find and modify certain text strings in larger corpora. Basically I look for something like this:
"Report From Week 758"
"And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . ."
and then some text, your name, and your town, arranged in this familiar way:"GlaxoSmithKline: I have six kids named Chesterfield, Winston, Lark, BensonHedges, Doral and Kool. If I name my new baby Nicorette, can I get a free coupon for your products? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)"I don't catch everything, but I believe I find 90%.
Unlike in the table to the left, I've arranged these in chronological order, so you can see how your humor matured, like a forgotten cheese deep in the walls of an old house. You started out, perhaps in Year 1, sending in riddles you sort of remembered from grade school, and now look at ya, ain't you Dorothy Parker.
[still working on this ...]