PERMANENT INKSTAIN FOR TOM GREENING
This is what you've done, each Week. I arrange the rows in reverse chronological order, because there are some Losers, and they know who they are, who check up on my points-awarding every Week.But I would just like to reiterate that such checking up is not a problem for me. I have said many times that each Loser's enlightened self-interest is my best QA.
If you wish to see what your ink was, refer to the Master Contest List or search All Invitational Text. Remember that Types I, P, some H, and sometimes A are seen "above the Report" -- that is, if they are listed here for Week 7777, for example, they will be found in text files or images of Week 7777. Everything else will be found in a "Report" section of a file two, three, or four weeks later; 7781 in this Example.
If you see any error, please let me know, email@example.com.
Key to Ink Types:
- 1: 1st Runner-Up; rarely seen now, last awarded to Jon Dixon in Week 792.
- H: Honorable Mention, sometimes appearing in the setup of a new contest.
||Our Greatest Hit
||Take a word, term or name that begins with E, F, G or H; either add one letter, subtract one letter, replace one letter, or transpose two letters; and define the new word.
||H H |
||It's the Eponymy, Stupid
||Coin a word or expression based on the name of a well-known person, define it, and perhaps use it in a sentence
||I've Told You a Hundred Times
||Enter any Style Invitational from Week 536 to Week 631. Your entry must be substantially different from the original winners.
||Write a limerick or other short poem with comically awful rhyming.
||1 H H |
||The LMNs of Style
||Write a funny sentence (or more) that you spell with only the sounds of the names of letters and those of numbers 1 through 9.
||H H H |
||Pay tribute in verse to someone who died in 2003.
||And the Horse He Rodin On
||Come up with some words we can stick in the back of The Inker.
||Take a word from the dictionary, add, change, or delete a single letter, and redefine the word.
||H H |
||Words of One Syl- … Um, Just Short Words
||Take some complex issue of any sort and explain it to all us morons entirely in words of one syllable.
||H H H |
||Come with a passage in a novel that ineptly describes hanky-panky.
||Give us an obit headline for some famous person, currently living or dead.
MOST OF YOUR INK
Here is, I hope, most of your ink to be found in the All Invitational Text list. I have to find these with what are called regular expressions, which is a method used in a lot of programming languages to find and modify certain text strings in larger corpora. Basically I look for something like this:
"Report From Week 758"
"And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . ."
and then some text, your name, and your town, arranged in this familiar way:"GlaxoSmithKline: I have six kids named Chesterfield, Winston, Lark, BensonHedges, Doral and Kool. If I name my new baby Nicorette, can I get a free coupon for your products? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)"I don't catch everything, but I believe I find 90%.
Unlike in the table to the left, I've arranged these in chronological order, so you can see how your humor matured, like a forgotten cheese deep in the walls of an old house. You started out, perhaps in Year 1, sending in riddles you sort of remembered from grade school, and now look at ya, ain't you Dorothy Parker.
[still working on this ...]