PERMANENT INKSTAIN FOR LARRY GRAY

This is what you've done, each Week. I arrange the rows in reverse chronological order, because there are some Losers, and they know who they are, who check up on my points-awarding every Week.

But I would just like to reiterate that such checking up is not a problem for me. I have said many times that each Loser's enlightened self-interest is my best QA.

If you wish to see what your ink was, refer to the Master Contest List or search All Invitational Text. Remember that Types I, P, some H, and sometimes A are seen "above the Report" -- that is, if they are listed here for Week 7777, for example, they will be found in text files or images of Week 7777. Everything else will be found in a "Report" section of a file two, three, or four weeks later; 7781 in this Example.

If you see any error, please let me know, elden.carnahan@gmail.com.

Key to Ink Types:

WKTITLESYNOPSISINK TYPES
1274 Heading for a foal -- our horse name 'breeding' contest Your job is to "breed" any two names of the 360 horses nominated for this year's Triple Crown races and name the "foal" to reflect both names. H
1247 Script tease Offer a quote from a script whose title you've given a different plot. 3 H H H
1242 Generation Yux Give us a "then/now" joke. H
1233 Not TheLoserCommunity getsaweekoff(actually two)fromwritingcontest entriesandwillhaveto findsomethingelsetodo duringstaffmeetings, sermons,romantic breakups,etc. H H H
1227 Celebrate ortho-diversity! Name and describe a new life form -- and no letter in the term may be used twice. H
1226 Colt following: The 'grandfoals' "Breed" any two of the 61 foal names that got ink this week, and name the offspring to reflect both parents names. H
1222 Foaling around "Breed" any two of the provided racehorses nominated for this year's Kentucky Derby, Preakness and Belmont; and name the foal to reflect both of them. H
1221 Who's kidding whom? Take two people from history, past or present, and tell what their child would be like H H H H H
1212 The Tile Invitational IV Give us a five-, six- or seven-letter word (or two words) by scrambling the letters of any of the provided sets and define it. H
1197 Picture This -- It's a Bob Staake caption contest Write a caption for any of the cartoons provided. 4 H
1196 Hyphen the Terrible Combine either half of a hyphenated word or compound term with either half of another such term to create a new hyphenated term, and describe the result humorously. H
1187 Just drop it, okay? Drop the last letter from an existing word, phrase or name and define the result. H H
1178 A ______ of collective nouns Propose one or more funny new names for groups of things. H
1174 Colt following -- It's time for the grandfoals "Breed" any two of the 57 foal names that got ink this week and name the offspring to reflect both parents' names. H W
1170 Derby or not Derby "Breed" any two of the provided racehorses nominated for this year's Kentucky Derby, Preakness and Belmont; and name the foal to reflect both names. H
1165 B all you can B Change a word, phrase or name by adding one or more B's, and/or by replacing one or more letters with B's, and define your new term. H
1164 'Wait Wait' for us Compose a multiple-choice question about a Ridiculous but True fact or event, with two entertaining wrong answers as well as the right one. One of the two wrong answers may be obviously untrue as long as it's funny. W
1160 A remeaning task Redefine an existing word or two-word term beginning with P through Z. H H
1147 It's E-Z find-a-word -- yours Create a word or multi-word term that consists of adjacent letters -- in any direction or several directions -- in the provided grid, and provide a humorous definition. H H
1146 Stick it to us with a magnet Suggest a new Style Invitational honorable-mention magnet. H
1145 A DICEy situation Coin a word or multi-word term that contains the letter block D-I-C-E. H
1144 Someone else's business Name a real brand, along with something else it would be a better name for. 4 H
1140 You're giving us a bad name Cite a REAL brand name, past or present, note it original use, and then say what sort of product, organization, etc., that name would be bad for. H H
1137 Be a published author! Give us a spicy title for a boring book, real or imagined. H
1135 The meter's running Suggest actions in daily life that should require a time limit -- maximum or minimum -- and come with an appropriate penalty for running over (or under). H H
1125 The song remains the sa Supply a real song title that has the end or beginning -- or, what the heck, both -- chopped off and describe it. H
1121 The an(n)als of civilization Briefly describe some "bad day in history" -- you may be creative in what you classify as such -- and sum it up with a humorous heading. H
1118 Breed 'em and weep Breed any two of the provided 100 racehorses nominated for this year's Triple Crown events and name the foal the reflect both names. H
1111 When you riff upon a store Use a wordplay on a song title as a name or slogan for a real or imagined business. H
1104 A pair of threes Choose two or three entities represented by a single three-letter combination beginning with E- through H- see the links at bit.ly/abbrevs-e-h and say how they are alike or different. W
1103 Themes good enough for us Suggest an existing song to be used as the theme for a TV series or program for comic effect. H W
1097 Futz your sign Select a line from one of the horoscopes appearing anytime from Nov. 6 through Nov. 17 in the Washington Post's daily Style or on washingtonpost.com and "clarify" it with a translation or extra "information". H
1094 TAXI's the fare for Tour de Fours XI Coin a word or hyphenated term that contains the letter block T-A-X-I; the letters may be in any order, but there may be no other letters between them. H
1091 Good idea! or not. Come up with a good idea and, through a small change in wording, a bad idea. H
1086 Playing the dozens 1. Start with any 12-letter word, name or multi-word phrase.
2. Add one letter OR drop one letter OR substitute another letter OR switch the position of two letters to create a new term, as in the examples given.
3. Define or describe the result humorously.
W
1073 Bank shots: Mess with (y)our heads Quote a headline appearing in the Washington Post, washington.com or another publication, print or headline, dated May 22 to June 1, and supply a bank" headline that either misinterprets it, as in the examples above, or comments wryly on it. H
1072 The Tile Invitational Come up with a 5-, 6-, or 7-letter term by scrambling any of the given seven-letter ScrabbleGram sets, and define it. H
1071 A pair of threes Choose two or three entities represented by a single three-letter combination at bit.ly/3letterabs and say how they are alike or different. H
1068 An iffy proposition Suggest some humorous action that you would take if you were in someone's position, more or less in the form "If I were _____ my first act would be _____." H
1065 The ands have it Slightly alter ANY well-known phrase in the form "A-and-B" -- it doesn't have to be Latinate/Anglo-Saxon -- and define it. 3 H H
1058 Eastwood Ho Create a good-bad-ugly progression. H
1052 Clue us in Come up with up to 25 creative, funny clues for the words and multi-word terms that appear in the provided grid. H
1049 Be rating Come up with a new movie rating and describe it. H
1045 Songs for the asking Take a sentence, phrase or title forms a song and provide a funny question it might answer. H W
1042 Tour de Fours X: Go SANE Create a new word or two-word term containing the letter block S-A-N-E -- in any order, but consecutively, and define it. H
1041 What have you got to lose? Answer a question, real or rhetorical, that appears in a song. H
1037 Outrage us Find something offensive about an inoffensive name of a product, organization, place, etc. H
1023 Hai there, Martians! Write one or more humorous haiku that will greet the Martians or share a little nugget of what life is like on Earth. H
1021 'Gram theft Come up with a term by scrambling any of the letters sets in the provided list, and define it. H H
1020 Colt following Breed any two of this week's winning foals and name the grandfoal. H H
1016 Foaling around Breed any two of the horses nominated for this year's Triple Crown races and give the foal a name humorously reflecting the names of the parents. H
1007 Clue us in Come up with creative, funny clues for the words and multi-word terms in the provided grid. H
1006 It's a ... a ... Create a new superhero (or due) and describe the superpower, or not-very-superpower. H H
1000 We now have 4 digits; you now have 7 letters Choose any word, name or two-word term beginning anywhere from T through Z; then add one letter, drop one letter, substitute one letter for another, or transpose two adjacent letters, and define the result. H H
979 The madding crowd Suggest funny, original ways to tick people off. H
977 Lost in Translation 2.0 Translate a line of text from English into another language using Google Translate; then copy that result and translate it back into English. You may also make intermediate steps into one or more other languages. H H H
976 Join now! Combine the beginning and end of any two words or names in this week's Style Invitational or Style Conversational columns to make a new term, and define it. 4 H H H
975 Gone mything Debunk a "Sixth Myth" about one of more of the recent "5 Myths" topics provided. 2
973 A real triple crown The horses in this week's list either produced no inking "foals" in Week 965, or ran in the Kentucky Derby but weren't on the initial list. "Breed" any two and name the foal. H
962 Questionable journalism Take any sentence (or a major part of it) that appears in the Post or in an article on washingtonpost.com anytime from now through March 19 and supply a question it could answer. H H
955 Twits' twist Create a phrase by combining a word or phrase with an anagram of that word or phrase, and define or describe it. H H H
953 Clue us in Come up with creative, funny clues for the words and multi-word terms in the crossword puzzle that's already run in The Post. H
949 Putting the SAT in satire Give us an analogy using "a is to b as x is to y." H H
948 Look back in Inker Enter any Style Invitational contest from Week 891 through 94 (except for Week 896, which was the same contest for the previous year). 3 H H H
947 Tour de Fours VIII: Neologisms Come up with a new word or two-word term that includes the letter block N-O-E-L, in any order but with no other letters between them, and define it. H
946 Another round of Bierce Write a clever definition of a word, name or multi-word term. H
943 Ask backward XXIX You are on "Jeopardy!" You supply the questions for as many of the provided answers as you like. H
941 They don't say! Give us a quote that a particular person, present or past, real or fictional, sooo wouldn't have said. H
937 Staake it to him Write a caption for any of the five pages or details pictured from some of Bob's more than 50 picture books. 4
931 Limerixicon 8 Supply a humorous limerick significantly featuring any English word, name or term beginning with the letters ea- through -el. H H
928 Play feature Use the title of a movie as the answer to a riddle or other question. H H
923 Chemical Wordfare Create a new chemical element or other chemical term. H

MOST OF YOUR INK

Here is, I hope, most of your ink to be found in the All Invitational Text list. I have to find these with what are called regular expressions, which is a method used in a lot of programming languages to find and modify certain text strings in larger corpora. Basically I look for something like this:

"Report From Week 758"

or

"And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . ."

and then some text, your name, and your town, arranged in this familiar way:

"GlaxoSmithKline: I have six kids named Chesterfield, Winston, Lark, BensonHedges, Doral and Kool. If I name my new baby Nicorette, can I get a free coupon for your products? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)"

I don't catch everything, but I believe I find 90%.

Unlike in the table to the left, I've arranged these in chronological order, so you can see how your humor matured, like a forgotten cheese deep in the walls of an old house. You started out, perhaps in Year 1, sending in riddles you sort of remembered from grade school, and now look at ya, ain't you Dorothy Parker.





[still working on this ...]