PERMANENT INKSTAIN FOR GREG DOBBINS
This is what you've done, each Week. I arrange the rows in reverse chronological order, because there are some Losers, and they know who they are, who check up on my points-awarding every Week.But I would just like to reiterate that such checking up is not a problem for me. I have said many times that each Loser's enlightened self-interest is my best QA.
If you wish to see what your ink was, refer to the Master Contest List or search All Invitational Text. Remember that Types I, P, some H, and sometimes A are seen "above the Report" -- that is, if they are listed here for Week 7777, for example, they will be found in text files or images of Week 7777. Everything else will be found in a "Report" section of a file two, three, or four weeks later; 7781 in this Example.
If you see any error, please let me know, email@example.com.
Key to Ink Types:
- W: Win, whether of the regular contest or the auxiliary contests.
- 1: 1st Runner-Up; rarely seen now, last awarded to Jon Dixon in Week 792.
- H: Honorable Mention, sometimes appearing in the setup of a new contest.
||Neologisms to di- for
||Replace a digraph in an existing word or phrase with another digraph to make a new term.
||It's IGH time for 3-word phrases
||Make up some entity that might take a three-letter abbreviation of GHI, HGI, GGG, GHH, etc., and then humorously describe it.
||These objects are not what they seem to be, at first glance. They are something else entirely. What are they?
||Name the Day
||Cite an actual holiday or one of those silly commemorative days, weeks or months for which you can find previous evidence, and supply a snarky description or slogan.
||Tell us a sign that the economy couldn't get worse.
||DQ Very Much
||Give us a phrase or sentence that would nip a potential relationship in the bud (or elsewhere).
||Give us an original name in any of the above categories (not an actual badly named product).
||You are on "Jeopardy!" Here are the answers. You supply one or more of the questions.
||Briefly define or sum up an existing word or short phrase, then change it very slightly and do the same with the result.
||Ripped Off From the Headlines
||Send us some Onion-type headlines.
||Combine the beginning and end of any two words appearing in any single advertisement in The Post or on washingtonpost.com, from today through Aug. 4, and then define the new word.
||Come up with a humorous name for a guide or manual for, or a book about, a particular enterprise or organization.
||The Events Described Herein Are Entirely Fictitious
||Come up with fictitious movie trivia.
||THE CONGRESSIONAL RECORD INVITATIONAL
||Come up with not-quite-ready inventions, past or present.
||IT'S LIKE THIS
||Come up with really lame analogies.
MOST OF YOUR INK
Here is, I hope, most of your ink to be found in the All Invitational Text list. I have to find these with what are called regular expressions, which is a method used in a lot of programming languages to find and modify certain text strings in larger corpora. Basically I look for something like this:
"Report From Week 758"
"And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . ."
and then some text, your name, and your town, arranged in this familiar way:"GlaxoSmithKline: I have six kids named Chesterfield, Winston, Lark, BensonHedges, Doral and Kool. If I name my new baby Nicorette, can I get a free coupon for your products? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)"I don't catch everything, but I believe I find 90%.
Unlike in the table to the left, I've arranged these in chronological order, so you can see how your humor matured, like a forgotten cheese deep in the walls of an old house. You started out, perhaps in Year 1, sending in riddles you sort of remembered from grade school, and now look at ya, ain't you Dorothy Parker.
[still working on this ...]