This is what you've done, each Week. I arrange the rows in reverse chronological order, because there are some Losers, and they know who they are, who check up on my points-awarding every Week.

But I would just like to reiterate that such checking up is not a problem for me. I have said many times that each Loser's enlightened self-interest is my best QA.

If you wish to see what your ink was, refer to the Master Contest List or search All Invitational Text. Remember that Types I, P, some H, and sometimes A are seen "above the Report" -- that is, if they are listed here for Week 7777, for example, they will be found in text files or images of Week 7777. Everything else will be found in a "Report" section of a file two, three, or four weeks later; 7781 in this Example.

If you see any error, please let me know,

Key to Ink Types:

1454 Punku 3 -- haiku with a pun Create a haiku containing a pun or similar wordplay. H
1451 Could have said it worse ourselves Give us a humorously bad "first draft" of a famous line from history, literature or entertainment. H H
1437 One-offs: A 'typo' neologism contest You're a fat-fingered typist: Change a word, name or phrase by either adding or substituting one letter that's adjacent (in any direction) to the original one on a regular QWERTY keyboard, or by doubling the correct letter. L
1392 Picture this -- caption these cartoons Write a caption, either descriptive or in dialogue, for any of the provided Bob Staake cartoons. 4 H
1376 Get thee to a funnery Add a character (or more) to a Shakespeare play and supply some resulting dialogue. H H
1352 Hee-rotica -- Steamy prose for unsteamy life Write a short steamy scene (100 words would be considered long) about a non-steamy event. H
1329 Shakespeare + Thee: Tailgaters Select any line from a work by Shakespeare (poetry or prose) and pair it with your own line to create a humorous rhyming couplet. W
1326 Foaling around "Breed" any two names from the provided list of 100 horses and name the foal to reflect both names. H
1242 Generation Yux Give us a "then/now" joke. H
1235 The Sound of Science Write humorous lyrics on the subject of science or technology, set to a well-known tune. L
1232 Picture this -- a caption contest Write a caption for one or more of the provided cartoons. H
1219 Cast your Bred upon us Write a Lik the Bred verse about someone in the news lately. H
1212 The Tile Invitational IV  Give us a five-, six- or seven-letter word (or two words) by scrambling the letters of any of the provided sets and define it. H
1209 Invented facts: A fictoid contest Tell us a humorously untrue account of how a product or invention came to be, or got its name. 2 H H
1198 Give it to us straight Take any sentence from an article or ad in any publication dated Oct. 20 to Oct. 31 — or from an online article dated within that period — and translate it into “plain English". H
1182 Where in the wor(l)d? (1) On, find one or more humorously appropriate (or ironic) three-word codes at a particular place; or 2) find a three-word code, tell us where it is, and tell us what ought to be there. H
1167 So what's to liken? Take any two items from the provided list and explain how they're similar or different, or connect them some other way. H
1166 Questionable journalism Take a sentence (or most of a sentence) that appears in text (not a headline) in The Washington Post or on dated March 10-21 and make up a question that the sentence could answer H
1163 Put it in reverse Spell a word, name or phrase backward and define the result in a way that relates to the original. H
1140 You're giving us a bad name Cite a REAL brand name, past or present, note its original use, and then say what sort of product, organization, etc., that name would be bad for. H
1139 A little sixty-four play Fashion an entry by selecting one element from each of the provided menu groups. Make sure you indicate the combination you chose (e.g., 2-C-iii). H
1130 Yux Redux: Play on a foreign phrase Make a word play on a foreign phrase or term (or English phrase using foreign words) and describe it. H H H
1125 The song remains the sa Supply a real song title that has the end or beginning -- or, what the heck, both -- chopped off and describe it. H
1118 Breed 'em and weep Breed any two of the provided 100 racehorses nominated for this year's Triple Crown events and name the foal the reflect both names. H
1096 Picture this Write a humorous caption for any of the provided Bob Staake cartoons. H
1079 Little piddle riddle Ask a question and answer it with a rhyme. H
1059 With parens like these … Add some words in parentheses to a well-known song title to make it funnier in some way. H H
1048 Ask Backwards You supply the questions to as many of the provided answers as you like. H
1039 Shookespeare Combine any of the words in Hamlet's "To be, or not to be" soliloquy, in any order, to create a humorous sentence or longer passage. I
670 A Test of Character Change a word or phrase by only one letter -- substitute one letter for another, add a letter or transpose two letters -- and explain how they are different or similar. H


Here is, I hope, most of your ink to be found in the All Invitational Text list. I have to find these with what are called regular expressions, which is a method used in a lot of programming languages to find and modify certain text strings in larger corpora. Basically I look for something like this:

"Report From Week 758"


"And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . ."

and then some text, your name, and your town, arranged in this familiar way:

"GlaxoSmithKline: I have six kids named Chesterfield, Winston, Lark, BensonHedges, Doral and Kool. If I name my new baby Nicorette, can I get a free coupon for your products? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)"

I don't catch everything, but I believe I find 90%.

Unlike in the table to the left, I've arranged these in chronological order, so you can see how your humor matured, like a forgotten cheese deep in the walls of an old house. You started out, perhaps in Year 1, sending in riddles you sort of remembered from grade school, and now look at ya, ain't you Dorothy Parker.

[still working on this ...]