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PERMANENT INKSTAIN FOR BOB SORENSEN



WEEK TITLE SYNOPSIS INK Types
1027 Built for two Give humorous related names for any pair of features in a given building, organization, etc. H
794 Ripped Off From the Headlines Send us some Onion-type headlines. H
668 Cut From the Chase Write an original John-Bunnell-style wrap-up to a crime story -- or one for a more minor transgression. H
615 Airy Persiflage Write some jokes you'd like to hear in an airport announcement. H H
559 Your Slogan Here Come up with a clever slogan or sign for a business. H
440 Picture This What is going on in these cartoons? T
437 The Telegraph Poll Tell us the beginning of a joke that badly telegraphs the punch line. H
423 Roling With Laughter Take a character from one movie, use him or her to replace a character in a second movie, and then explain how this change would affect the second movie. H
422 Taught Language Come up with lessons learned from (1) the movies, (2) popular songs, (3) romance novels or (4) the comics page. W
419 Don't Spare the Rodney Come up with indications that one might not be getting no respect. H H
418 Xtreme Invitational Come up with signs you are overdoing it any in any of the provided categories. H H H
412 Painful Climaxes Come up with statements that start really dramatically, but leave you sorta flat at the end. 3
407 Adverbiage Come up with a witticism or a joke by making a pun out of an adverb. Unlike Tom Swiftlys, your adverb must modify not a verb but an adjective. H
406 Bum Steerage Offer some spectacularly bad advice to any of the provided people. H H
401 A Matter of Degree Describe a sign of some modest change in a situation and pair it with a sign of an extreme change in that same situation. H
400 Life Is Snort Write a "Life is Short" entry in under 100 words, in the voice of a celebrity, living or dead. H
398 Animal Magnetism Make great literature and/or a significant expression of the human condition out of the provided randomly-selected words. Use whatever punctuation you choose and any of the words, but only those words, and use them only once. H
396 April Foals Mate any two of the horses qualifying for the Triple Crown races and come up with appropriate names for their foals. Maximum 18 letters and spaces. H
395 Devilishly Clever Describe someone's special little corner of Hell. H
394 Life in the Blurbs Come up with a blurb used to sell a real or imagined book or movie that would be likely to have the opposite of the intended effect. H
391 Spinning Out of Control Take a headline in today's Washington Post and create a subhead that spins the story in an opposite or unexpected direction. H
389 Operation Overkill Present a solution to a problem that goes just a little too far. I
387 By Jingo Come up with a joke that could be written and understood only by a Washingtonian. H
386 The Game of Clue What are some clues that someone might be any of the provided characterizations? H
377 Week MMDCXLIV Provide a headline (and, if necessary, the first line of the text) for any article that will appear in The Washington Post on this day in the year 2050. H
376 Apply Yourself Supply bad openings to college application biographies. H
355 Seeing Stars Tell us ways we can attract celebrity participation to this contest. H
340 ASK BACKWARDS 12 You are on "Jeopardy!" Here are the answers. What are the questions? H
339 Campaignful Developments Come up with signs that a presidential campaign might be in trouble. H H
338 WHO WANTS TO WIN A TOILET? Propose even greater depths of shameless, tasteless sleaze to which Fox TV is likely to sink after the noisome debacle of "Who Wants to Marry a Multi-Millionaire? H
334 The New Style Invitational: Six Choices for Czar Vote for one of six possible editors of the Style Invitational, from among the current Czar and five worthy competitors. U
327 ASK BACKWARDS You are on "Jeopardy!" These are the answers. What are the questions? H
325 THE BURMA ROAD Propose welcoming doggerel for states or cities patterned after Burma Shave signs. H
324 A PREQUEL OPPORTUNITY OFFERING Come up with a "prequel" to some classic film or work of literature. You must produce a title and a brief plot summary, which of course must take place prior to the main action of the original work. 2
322 YOU NAME IT Take a well known pair or group of names, extend one of them in some manner, and explain how the group dynamic changes. H
316 CALLING THE TOON What are these things? H
313 THE STYLE INVITATIONAL SOUVENIR SHOP Come up with bad names for a new store at a mall. H
310 IT'S LIKE THIS Come up with really lame analogies. H
217 NO QUESTION ABOUT IT Come up with truly stupid questions. H
201 THE ELEMENTS OF STYLE Come up with a new element and its symbol, and provide a brief description of its chemical or physical properties. H
198 YOU MUST BE MAD II Come up with proposals designed to infuriate special interest groups. W
190 OFFICE YOU CAN'T REFUSE Come up with a Principle for the Workplace. I
185 WONDERLUST Come up with replacements for the Seven Wonders of the World. To qualify, an object must really exist, and be manmade and, in some way, awesome. E
181 YOU CAN TAKE IT TO DEBUNK Take a common slogan or saying and prove it wrong with at least one example. H
178 DEEP THROATS Come up with Deep Thoughts, in the style of Jack Handey of "Saturday Night Live." A Deep Thought is a short, simple, seemingly inspirational observation that winds up being cynical, ironic, or just plain weird. H E
176 WRITE IN THE KISSER In the style of any famous author, write a description of any one of these people: Bill Clinton, Bob Dole, Hillary Rodham Clinton, Prince Charles or Sylvester Stallone. E
169 DIFF'RENT JOKES Tell us the difference between any two of the provided items. H
162 MAY WE HAVE YOUR PRETENSION, PLEASE? Come up with the most pretentious original sentence possible. H H H
161 CAPITOL MISTAKES Come up with very, very bad advice for first-time visitors to Washington. H
160 SEEKING WISE GUYS Come up with cool new bad-guy terms. H H
145 LOOIE, LOOIE Come up with paired, themed ladies' room and men's room signs for various types of public places. 2