PERMANENT INKSTAIN FOR DION BLACK

This is what you've done, each Week. I arrange the rows in reverse chronological order, because there are some Losers, and they know who they are, who check up on my points-awarding every Week.

But I would just like to reiterate that such checking up is not a problem for me. I have said many times that each Loser's enlightened self-interest is my best QA.

If you wish to see what your ink was, refer to the Master Contest List or search All Invitational Text. Remember that Types I, P, some H, and sometimes A are seen "above the Report" -- that is, if they are listed here for Week 7777, for example, they will be found in text files or images of Week 7777. Everything else will be found in a "Report" section of a file two, three, or four weeks later; 7781 in this Example.

If you see any error, please let me know, elden.carnahan@gmail.com.

Key to Ink Types:

WKTITLESYNOPSISINK TYPES
1333 Check your (homo)phones Invent a homophone--a word that sounds the same as an existing word but is spelled differently--and define it. H
1254 Inkorporation--a change-one-letter contest Change the name of a present or past business, store or agency (not just a product) by adding one letter, deleting one letter, transposing two letters or substituting one letter for another. H
1222 Foaling around "Breed" any two of the provided racehorses nominated for this year's Kentucky Derby, Preakness and Belmont; and name the foal to reflect both of them. H
1198 Give it to us straight Take any sentence from an article or ad in any publication dated Oct. 20 to Oct. 31 — or from an online article dated within that period — and translate it into “plain English". H
1177 The ballad box Write a song related to this year's elections, set to a familiar tune. I
1159 It's all in the game Come up with a funny/ridiculous board-type game and describe it. H W
1147 It's E-Z find-a-word -- yours Create a word or multi-word term that consists of adjacent letters -- in any direction or several directions -- in the provided grid, and provide a humorous definition. H H
1134 The 'Sty'le Invitational Red'ux' Put quotation marks around part of a word, name or phrase and define the result. H H
1125 The song remains the sa Supply a real song title that has the end or beginning -- or, what the heck, both -- chopped off and describe it. H H
1123 The Tile Invitational III Give us a five-, six-, or seven-letter word (or two words) by scrambling the letters of any of the provided seven-letter sets. 4 H
1118 Breed 'em and weep Breed any two of the provided 100 racehorses nominated for this year's Triple Crown events and name the foal the reflect both names. H
1110 The mama of all humor Write a [Someone’s] Mama joke for some well-known figure, past or present, real or fictional. H
1109 Fictoids of Columbia Tell us some humorously untrue “facts” about Washington, D.C., and the surrounding area. H
1011 Top these! Try your hand at any of the contests mentioned in this look back. H
1006 It's a ... a ... Create a new superhero (or duo) and describe the superpower, or not-very-superpower. H H
1003 Just do it Use a well-known advertising slogan for a different company, organization or product to humorous effect. H H I
988 A faster break Suggest ways to make sports and other leisure activities more time-efficient or exciting. H
979 The madding crowd Suggest funny, original ways to tick people off. 2 H
975 Gone mything Debunk a "Sixth Myth" about one of more of the recent "5 Myths" topics provided. H
971 Double booking Come up with a double book with a humorous connection; the first title must be an actual book, while the other may be your own fictitious title or a second real book. H H
965 Foaling around Breed any two of the horses in this year's Triple Crown races and name their foal. H
959 Out of network Move a current or former TV program (or type of programming) to a different network and explain what would change. H
951 Say that again Double a word, or use a word and its homophone, to make a phrase, and define it. 4
947 Tour de Fours VIII: Neologisms Come up with a new word or two-word term that includes the letter block N-O-E-L, in any order but with no other letters between them, and define it. H
936 Hoho contendere Slightly alter a well-known foreign-language term and define it. H
932 We'll call them your-mama jokes Tell us an original "your mama" joke. H H I
928 Play feature Use the title of a movie as the answer to a riddle or other question. H
910 Your ad here Slightly alter an advertising slogan so that someone else could use it. H
908 Recast away Fire an actor or actress from a movie or TV show, past or present, and offer a replacement for the role. I
901 Dead Letters Write a humorous poem about someone who died in 2010. H H
897 Catch their drift Take any sentence from an article or ad in The Washington Post or washingtonpost.com from Dec. 3 to Dec. 13 and translate it into "plain English." 2
895 Picture this Supply a caption for any of these cartoons. 4
888 It's the eponymy, stupid Coin a word or expression based on the name of a well-known person, define it, and perhaps use it in a sentence H
886 Look both ways Give us a new term that's a palindrome and define it. 3 H
884 Rekindling the spork Combine two devices or other products to make a new one. H
879 Say Venn Express some sentiment in the form of a Venn diagram. H
878 Safety in blunders Tell us a way to make the nation more secure. H
876 Oilies but goodies Write lyrics somehow related to the oil spill, set to an existing tune. H H
875 Fail Us Give us a funny Learn From My Fail-type lesson, 30 words or fewer, true or not, in your own words or attributed to a famous personage. H
872 Har Monikers Combine the first parts of each word in a famous person's or character's name -- in order -- and define it or use it in a sentence that somehow refers to its source. 2 H
871 Remarquees Change a movie title by one letter (or number, if the title includes a number) and describe the new film. H
863 It's Post time Breed any two of 100 of the almost 400 horses eligible for this year's Triple Crown races, and name the foal. H
861 It's incumbent upon us Combine the names of two or more freshman members of Congress to create "joint legislation." This week's pool of legislators includes only those who were elected to their seats before 1994, the first year we ran the freshman contest. H
860 Ten, Anyone? Humorously define or describe something or someone in exactly 10 words. H H
857 All FED Up Create a brand-new word or phrase that contains a block of three successive letters in the alphabet -- but the series must go backward through the alphabet. H
856 Titled Puerility Here are some untitled book covers. For any of them, tell us a title and synopsis of a book that will never be published. H
853 It's easy as DEF Create a brand-new word or phrase that contains a block of three successive letters in the alphabet; the series must go forward in the alphabet, not backward. H
849 Homonymphomania Create a new homonym (or homophone) for any existing word and define it. H H
845 Reologisms Write a description for any of 50 genuine Loser-created neologisms. H H
843 Prefrains Provide a sentence or two of lead-in to the first line of a well-known book, poem, or song. H
841 Food for naught Alter the name of a food or dish slightly and describe the result. H
839 Overlap Dance Overlap two words that share two or more consecutive letters -- anywhere in the word, not just at the beginning or end -- into a single longer word, and define it. AND your portmanteau word must begin with a letter from A through D. H

MOST OF YOUR INK

Here is, I hope, most of your ink to be found in the All Invitational Text list. I have to find these with what are called regular expressions, which is a method used in a lot of programming languages to find and modify certain text strings in larger corpora. Basically I look for something like this:

"Report From Week 758"

or

"And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . ."

and then some text, your name, and your town, arranged in this familiar way:

"GlaxoSmithKline: I have six kids named Chesterfield, Winston, Lark, BensonHedges, Doral and Kool. If I name my new baby Nicorette, can I get a free coupon for your products? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)"

I don't catch everything, but I believe I find 90%.

Unlike in the table to the left, I've arranged these in chronological order, so you can see how your humor matured, like a forgotten cheese deep in the walls of an old house. You started out, perhaps in Year 1, sending in riddles you sort of remembered from grade school, and now look at ya, ain't you Dorothy Parker.





[still working on this ...]