PERMANENT INKSTAIN FOR MARCY ALVO

This is what you've done, each Week. I arrange the rows in reverse chronological order, because there are some Losers, and they know who they are, who check up on my points-awarding every Week.

But I would just like to reiterate that such checking up is not a problem for me. I have said many times that each Loser's enlightened self-interest is my best QA.

If you wish to see what your ink was, refer to the Master Contest List or search All Invitational Text. Remember that Types I, P, some H, and sometimes A are seen "above the Report" -- that is, if they are listed here for Week 7777, for example, they will be found in text files or images of Week 7777. Everything else will be found in a "Report" section of a file two, three, or four weeks later; 7781 in this Example.

If you see any error, please let me know, elden.carnahan@gmail.com.

Key to Ink Types:

WKTITLESYNOPSISINK TYPES
1267 Jingle bungle Suggest an ill-advised spokesman (dead or alive, or fictional), along with a humorously noooo slogan or jingle. H
939 MASH 2: The Retread Combine two movie titles and describe the result. H
923 Chemical Wordfare Create a new chemical element or other chemical term. 3 H
822 For Real Folks Suggest some attractions for a Festival of Real American Folklife. H
802 Dreck TV Suggest a new cable TV channel, with a description or example of its programming. H I
774 Tour De Forks Supply a name for a restaurant dish named after someone (or some product or organization) and describe it. H
714 Amalgamated Steal Merge two or more company or product names into a new, ORIGINAL company or product. H
641 Dreck of All Trades Come up with a business that combines two or more disparate products or services, and tell us its name and/or something else funny about it. H
629 Odd Couplings Marry or otherwise combine famous names and supply the result. W
608 Comeback Next Week Come up with original snide retorts to various rude questions or comments. 2
594 History Loves Company Name an appropriate corporate sponsor for some historical event or for someone's life story. H
375 Show Us Up Combine the names of two existing TV shows (past or present) to make an entirely new show. Then, describe the show. H
303 BOOM TIMES Come up with old and new concerns for the baby boom generation. H

MOST OF YOUR INK

Here is, I hope, most of your ink to be found in the All Invitational Text list. I have to find these with what are called regular expressions, which is a method used in a lot of programming languages to find and modify certain text strings in larger corpora. Basically I look for something like this:

"Report From Week 758"

or

"And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago . . ."

and then some text, your name, and your town, arranged in this familiar way:

"GlaxoSmithKline: I have six kids named Chesterfield, Winston, Lark, BensonHedges, Doral and Kool. If I name my new baby Nicorette, can I get a free coupon for your products? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington)"

I don't catch everything, but I believe I find 90%.

Unlike in the table to the left, I've arranged these in chronological order, so you can see how your humor matured, like a forgotten cheese deep in the walls of an old house. You started out, perhaps in Year 1, sending in riddles you sort of remembered from grade school, and now look at ya, ain't you Dorothy Parker.





[still working on this ...]