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Copyright The Washington Post Company May 8, 2005

An article about a comedy camp for children in the Catskill mountains described one boy as "a real ham." The phrase should have read "a real brisket."

Tuesday's weather page reported a 70 percent chance of rain for the next day. The chance of rain Wednesday was actually 100 percent.

A recent story described the wife of the new pope and her plans to spruce up the Vatican. The pope is actually a bachelor.

This week's contest: This esteemed publication ran one of its most comical corrections ever recently when it clarified that "the Sunday, April 10, edition of 'The Mini Page,' about wind waves, tsunamis and tides, incorrectly indicated that the sun orbits the Earth." The correction was a pretty straightforward acknowledgment of a shockingly stupid inaccuracy (in the children's section, no less), but it can still serve as a gossamer thread to which the Empress can tie a contest: Give us some funny "corrections" to brighten up Page A2, as in the examples above, suggested by the always correct Russell Beland of Springfield. They can be funny because they are silly, or absurd, or because they suggest a stupid initial mistake, or any other reason you come up with.

The winner receives the Inker, the official Style Invitational trophy. First runner-up gets a fantastic audio CD called "Still Stayin' Alive: A Take Out Menu of Food Safety Hits," by toxicologist Carl Winter and featuring such rock parodies as "Fifty Ways to Eat Your Oysters" and "I Sprayed It on the Grapevine," donated by longtime Loser Sarah W. Gaymon of Gambrills.

Other runners-up win a coveted Style Invitational Loser T-shirt. Honorable mentions get one of the lusted-after Style Invitational Magnets. One prize per entrant per week. Send your entries by e- mail to losers@washpost.com or, if you really have to, by fax to 202- 334-4312. Deadline is Monday, May 16. Put the week number in the subject line of your e-mail, or it risks being ignored as spam. Include your name, postal address and phone number with your entry. Contests are judged on the basis of humor and originality. All entries become the property of The Washington Post. Entries may be edited for taste or content. Results will be published June 5. No purchase required for entry. Employees of The Washington Post, and their immediate relatives, are not eligible for prizes. Pseudonymous entries will be disqualified. The revised title for next week's contest is by Phil Frankenfeld of Washington.

Report from Week 605, in which we asked you to explain the difference or similarity between two real or fictional people with the same initials. This contest turned out to be harder than we'd predicted, with Losers stretching like Mrs. Incredible to contrive some pathetically awkward connection (e.g., "Jean-Jacques Rousseau taught us about the many faces of enlightenment. Joan Rivers's taut face is more like enfrightenment"). But as usual, among the chaff, there was, uh, wheat.

{diam}Third runner-up: Bart Simpson never has a cow. Barbra Streisand never has a pig. (Mike Fransella, Arlington)

{diam}Second runner-up: Carrie Bradshaw and Chef Boyardee: Sex and the ziti. (Chris Doyle, Raleigh)

{diam}First runner-up, the winner of the antique French plate that was made in China in 2003: John Wilkes Booth and John Wayne Bobbitt: Booth wasn't around for the painful Reconstruction. (Kevin d'Eustachio and Andrew Dutton, Linwood, N.J.)

{diam}And the winner of the Inker: Shirley Temple and Strom Thurmond: One publicly acknowledged a relationship with a Black. (Mark Eckenwiler, Washington)

{diam}Honorable Mentions:

Mick Jagger and Michael Jackson: Both date folks 30 years their junior. (Greg McGrew, Leesburg)

Susan Sarandon was in "Rocky Horror"; Sylvester Stallone was in several "Rocky" horrors. (Brendan Beary, Great Mills)

Bette Midler and Benito Mussolini: As far as I can tell, no pope has ever criticized either one by name. (Russell Beland, Springfield)

Bill Bixby and Barry Bonds: One became an incredible hulk by accident. (Jon Reiser, Hilton, N.Y.)

Yao Ming scores 20 times a night. So does Yo Mama!! (Brendan Beary)

Peter Angelos and Pamela Anderson: Isn't he rich? Aren't they a pair? (Brendan Beary)

Cher and Camille: When Camille retired, she retired. (Howard Walderman, Columbia)

Jose Canseco and Julius Caesar: Caesar's pals stabbed him in the back. (Steve Fahey, Kensington)

Charles Darwin and Charles de Gaulle: Both were concerned about how frogs might survive. (Mary Lou French, Eveleth, Minn.)

Jimmy Dean and Jeffrey Dahmer: One wanted us to eat his sausages, the other wanted us to be his sausages. (Dennis Lindsay, Seabrook)

Barbara Eden and Buddy Ebsen: Both were stars of '60s sitcoms, and we never saw their navels. (Brendan Beary)

Martha Stewart and "Last Tango in Paris" actress Maria Schneider: Martha would never let someone use butter straight from the wrapper. (Peter Metrinko, Chantilly)

Harrison Ford was famous for "Star Wars." Heidi Fleiss was famous getting stars whores. (Pam Sweeney, Germantown)

Huck Finn and Heidi Fleiss: Huck went down the river. (Mark Eckenwiler)

Jerry Garcia and Jeff Gillooly: A pipe got them in trouble with the law. (David Gardner, Richmond)

James Hanratty and John Holmes: One was hanged . . . (Russell Beland)

Pamela Harriman and Paris Hilton: Pamela was more discreet. (Chris Doyle)

Robin Hood and Rock Hudson: Both liked their merry men. (Randy Lee, Burke; Dave Prevar, Annapolis)

Jacques Barzun said, "Whoever wants to know the heart and mind of America had better learn baseball." Coincidentally, Joe Biden said that, too. (Brendan Beary)

Thomas Hobbes and Tonya Harding: To Hobbes, life was nasty, brutish and short. Tonya just was. (Seth Brown, North Adams, Mass.)

Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson: They appeared in an equal number of Wizards playoff games. (Greg Pearson, Arlington)

Bob Keeshan and Bobby Knight: Let's just say that Mr. Moose wouldn't dump those ping-pong balls a second time on one of them. (Brendan Beary)

Alan Keyes believes in old-fashioned marriage between a man and a woman; Ashton Kutcher is a man who believes in a fashionable marriage to an old woman. (Schuyler Clemente, Northampton, Mass.)

Jennifer Lopez and Jean Lafitte: The pirate tried to hide his booty. (Dave Franz, Havana, Cuba; Barbara Mason, Fort Washington)

Broderick Crawford played a state trooper who protected the citizenry. Bill Clinton was protected by state troopers while he played with the citizenry. (Chris Doyle)

Ru Paul and Richard Pryor: Only one was flaming by accident. (Mark Eckenwiler)

Dan Rather and Damon Runyon: Both created memorable works of fiction. (Jerry Ewing, Orlando)

Paul Revere and Paul Reubens: When Revere was caught, the British were coming. (Mark Eckenwiler)

Ronald Reagan and Rocky Raccoon: The girls of their fancy were both known as Nancy. (Michelle Stupak, Ellicott City)

William Shakespeare gave us Hamlet; William Shatner gave us ham. (Joseph Romm, Washington)

Helen of Troy and Harry Truman: One started a war and one ended one, although in both cases, Paris's weakness was partially to blame. (Mike Cisneros, Centreville)

Mike Tyson and Mao Tse-tung: An hour after eating, Mike's always hungry again. (Jack Cackler, Falls Church)

Mark Twain and Mike Tyson: As good a raconteur as he was, Twain would still only bend your ear. (Mark Eckenwiler)

Martha Washington and Mary Worth: Martha Washington was conceived a couple of years earlier. (Russell Beland)

Thomas Wolfe and Ted Williams: One got home again and again. (Sue Lin Chong, Baltimore)

Anti-Invitational: Elizabeth Dole. Her initials are ironic enough on their own. (Brendan Beary)

And Lasts: Tiger Woods and Tom Witte: Both were winners on April 10, but one got a green jacket and the other got rat brain tissue on a slide. (Jeff Covel, Arlington)

The Exorcist and The Empress: One casts out evil possessions, while the other mails them out as prizes. (Jerry Ewing)


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